Stunted Growth

[Charlotte Shimizu]

Charlie had told Hannah and Rini she needed a walk.

She most assuredly needed one, but she walked only to a coffee shop a few blocks away where she could meet up with the only person Charlie felt could understand her at this moment. Hannah certainly couldn’t, what with having landed a good paying job almost the moment she graduated from college. Rini couldn’t because her career was even more stymied than Charlie’s was. As glorious as it was to be able to team with Rini, everything Charlie’d done solo was just… not as good.

There’d been flashes of brilliance, like getting the win against Virginia Stepanov, or when she’d gone off the top of that ladder to put April Madrox (and herself) through that poor announcer’s table, or hanging toe-to-toe with Nick Knight. Yet there was so much that tarnished those moments; losing to some newcomer her first night, losing to HIJOU, not showing well in grand melees.

So there she was, ranting to Shea O’Hara in some random coffee shop in Texas between shows, trying to get the anxiety and self-doubt out of her system before she stepped into a ring again.

“I don’t want the belt…” Charlie explained, staring glumly at her tea. “I just want to be able to say that I was there for something. I wasn’t tapped for Heiress to the Throne; okay, fair enough. I hadn’t shown management what they needed to see for me to get that opp… Now I’m not in the Iron Maiden match… But this is after I got a shot at Knight? And took so much out of him that he was sitting in the ring, clutching the belt like a baby blanket, for a solid minute before he could stand again… So am I good or am I bad? I don’t even know anymore, Shea…”

“In fairness, Lottie, you don’t know if you’re not in the Iron Maiden yet. I’m under the impression they’re still trying to sort it out like, and a win in the four way this week could put you in good stead,” Shea said, sipping her latte.

Charlie grimaced. “Seemed pretty clear to me… There are only six spots, and eight women showed up at Odyssey, all chomping at the bit to get in. I wasn’t there, Shea. You were with me backstage, remember? Watching that entire shitshow go down.” She knew she sounded bitter, even if she’d deny it. It had been the story of her life at Neo-Honshu, watching everyone but her advance. She tried to swallow her tea past the lump that thought put in her throat with some success, though she was sure the unpleasant sensation would linger for a while.

“It’s true we had a match to prepare for, unlike the others, but like you must be in contention, otherwise you'd not be in the match you are in this week, like.”

Charlie sighed again. “I guess,” she reluctantly allowed. “I mean… Don’t get me wrong, I’m proud as hell over the showings I’ve put in, and I’m glad I got the shot at the Invictus belt… but it feels like I’m at a plateau, and this is either as good as I’ll ever be, or I’m about to take a steep dive, and not the one I like to take from the top turnbuckle.” Her self-depreciation was a poor attempt at humor. Charlie knew it, and was sure Shea knew it too.

“Oh believe me, Lottie, I’m no stranger to that feeling.” Shea took a longer, more considered sip of her latte, as if her exact words mattered. “Sometimes it’s been my fault, like when I rushed back so soon after - '' Shea stopped abruptly, making Charlie curious, but she wasn’t about to press Shea. No doubt she was kicking herself for jumping into the deep end so soon after her absence. Shea’s next words only confirmed Charlie’s thought. “Other times, like when I lost to Jennie in the first round of the Heiress a couple months back, it's just the luck of the draw. This can be a cruel business to even the best of us, it’s not always a lack of talent or ability. Just being in the wrong place at the wrong time, like.”

Charlie couldn’t stop the bitter laugh that escaped. “Six years with Neo-Honshu is a helluva wrong time in the wrong place.” Despite this, Charlie raised her cup to Shea, accepting the words as meant. “Here’s to us… We’re in the right place, now we just need the right time.”

Shea smiled and raised her own cup to Charlie’s. There was no clink because the cups were paper products, but it was the action that counted. In her head, a countdown to High Stakes began. How appropriate a name, since it was more than just titles on the line in Charlie’s mind; it felt like her very career was on the table.

---

The feed opens on Charlotte back in her priestess garb, kneeling before a small table with a traditional Japanese tea set on it. Her hair is in a simple tail, but the beaded braids hang freely around her face as a soft accent to her sharp features. Behind and over her head on the wall is a respectably sized kamidana surrounded by indigenous art and sacred items.

Her motions to make the tea are just as smooth and practiced with the delicate instruments of the task as she is within the squared circle. As she picks up each tool to cleanse it with a cloth, she speaks the name of an upcoming opponent. “Natasha Walker, Itami, and Mai Everstone,” she says softly, almost to herself. Another piece is picked up as she speaks briefly of each opponent. “Nat is a rising star that I’d rather have in my corner than across the ring from me… I’ve faced Itami, and I know I’m in for an uphill battle there… And I’ve barely seen Mai since I got here when she wasn’t with her flock and certainly not inside the ring…”

She continues her tea-making as she speaks in almost an idle fashion. “Let’s start with my favorite; Natasha Walker. Nat, ma gurl. We may not be able to actually team up, but I still got yer back, girlie… And you know I got your back against Serenity any day. If I were still the Gaijin Priestess, I’d make a very unsportsman-like suggestion… But I’m playing fair these days, so as long as she keeps her nose clean, we won’t need to rub her face in it.”

Nimble fingers, aided by a bamboo spoon, take two large scoops of the green powder and put it into the bowl she’d prepared for it. She then carefully adds the water to the cup using the long-handled ladle.

“Itami-sama… I’m sorry for how things went the last time we were in a ring together, but we both know that if you’d pulled yourself together first, you would’ve gone for the win, same as I did. I know how frustrating the fuckin’ three-way matches are because there’s a clear winner, a clear loser and someone stuck in the middle. I drew the proverbial short straw twice before I passed that baton to you. This match is arguably a worse scenario, since I’m sure there will be two in such a position. My only hope is that I either clearly win, or clearly lose.”

She starts whisking the tea in the bowl, easily creating the froth patterns so classic to Japanese matcha tea. “And Mai Everstone… The last time you were in a ring, you came out of a Maiden just as the bell rang. You lost without ever taking a hit. I can only imagine how that stung. Then, shit girlie… If rumors are true, you and several other people had their lives tossed into the business end of a twister and the remains left unrecognizable. Life outside the ring is stupid complicated, I get it. Even if the rumors aren’t true, having to deal with that sort of fiasco would be enough of an upset. In the end, it doesn’t matter. It boils down to the simple fact that you’ve been out of commission for nearly a year. You may have joined up with some shiny new friends, though I question your judgment on that, but your buddies need to know that helping you in this match is not really helping you. You accept their interference for a win, and you are tainting everything that comes after. Do you really want to question if you have earned what you get after this?”

She finishes stirring the green tea and she sets the delicate whisk to one side.

“I won’t lie. As good as I am, and I’ll admit that someone thinks I must be good to be the Breakout Star of ‘23, I don’t know if I’ll get the clear win here. Even if it were only two of the three women in the ring with me, I still wouldn’t know. Itami’s a fierce opponent and Nat is no one to scoff at. Mai is the wild card here, making an uncertain outcome even more uncertain.”

Almost as an afterthought, Charlotte turns and tilts the tea cup so the design in the froth is visible. How she had managed to create the heart design in the foam with the motions she’d used was a mystery. She gently puts the tea back down on the small table. “All I know is this… I am bringing my whole heart into that ring. I do it every time I step into the squared circle. Sometimes, that’s not enough and I can accept that. There is no shame in losing to the better opponent, and I acknowledge my opponents as skilled in their own ways.”

Charlotte rises easily from her kneeling position, her hands unconsciously brushing the pale blue hakama flat. “Do I think that I have better aerial moves than Mai? Easily, my answer is yes. She’s been out of a ring for nearly a year. Practice will only prevent the ring rust so much and y’all saw how much I got on me after only one month away from the squared circle. Do I think that skill can keep me from getting caught up by Nat’s Tschuigumo? Or keep me out of range of Itami’s strikes? Yes, I do. Will it keep me away from all of it? Hell no. You can’t land hits without putting yourself at risk of getting hit and I accept that risk.”

Charlotte approaches the camera until her face and shoulders are all that remain in frame. “I’m sure there are some that would say I take too many such risks, but I would say that those people have not found something they love as much as I love being in the ring. I’m well acquainted with losing, as my record can attest, but as long as I put my all into a match, I can win. So girlies? I will do whatever it takes to keep any of you from getting that clear win. I expect you to do nothing less.”

Charlotte’s hand comes up to cover the lens of the camera. The feed cuts. The video is later released in both Japanese and Cherokee languages.