Post by Gjenrei on Jan 26, 2014 8:43:50 GMT
{Darkness is often considered to be inherantly bad. The light offers peace and warmth, and the absence of it is usually thought of as cold and hopeless. But there's a certain serenity to be had when there's nothing but silence, no light, no sound to distract you from yourself. The man in the mask spent a lot of time as this recently, except of course for the modern convenience of a cell phone, which was ringing and ruining the whole experience. A hand reached out and grabbed it.}
Hello?
Hello, Chris.
Hello, sir.
I suppose that's better than Mister.
{For all his compassion, the man who adopted Gjenrei seemed to understand very little how his mind operated. But Gjenrei let that pass.}
Hello, Father. How nice to hear from you.
Now I think you're just messing with me, but that's probably just in my head. I was just wondering something.
Yes?
I was going over the financials and I noticed that there was a large sum of money transferred, signed by you. It's not a problem, of course. But I was wondering if you were.. ok.. over there.
{Gjenrei was unsurprised. Randall was a man who knew the concept of personal responsibility, and understood that you could blame anyone you liked for negative things, but if you did nothing to stop them yourself, you had nobody to blame but the one who failed to act.}
I, am fine, Father. A colleague of mine got into some hot water, owed money from a civil judgment he had nothing to do with. So, I offered to help him out.
Good old American legal system, eh? Everything settled now?
Yes.
{Gjenrei wasn't about to try explaining the whole situation with Pooler, and Randall seemed disinclined to ask for a complete explanation. There was a long silence.}
Has it really been as long as it has? 12 years now?
{The question caught the man in the mask off guard. Randall had never seemed to be one for calling to simply reminisce over old things long since past. Thoughts immediately returned to the past...}
-----Forever Ago - Japan-----
(All conversations are in Japanese, with helpful subtitles.)
{A young man sat in a chair, staring mutely at the floor. The people in the hospital shuffled around him, tending to their duties, paying him no mind. There was no news to give him, no status updates to inform him, his part was already over.
Tragedy be not undone by wishful thinking.
A man approached, looking strangely amiss in a navy suit in the sea of white and green hospital garb. Somber, etched on his aging face, he took a seat next to the young man.}
I'm sorry, Kurohito.. I just got word.
....Nothing can be done now. But I appreciate the sentiment, thank you.
{The young man's eyes didn't leave the floor, and the man didn't seem to know what to do. How did you comfort someone who just lost his entire world, before his life even truly began?}
Are you ok...?
I.. I should have been with them. I was.. supposed to be.
{Randall was unsure what to say. The trip was supposed to be a big outing of all the families from the company. He himself had to cancel last minute, as Elizabeth had taken ill from one silly thing or another. Had she not, he might have been carpooling with the family that had just been lost, and it may have been different. But telling him that wouldn't have much effect on now, would it?}
Things happen as they will, perhaps there was a reason you chose not to, just as there may have been a reason for us deciding to cancel this trip. Or we're just lucky, life has funny ways of working out.
I'm finding it difficult to believe that any sort of higher power is controlling the way this is ending. If so.. I have a few choice words for him.. or it..
I don't doubt that you do. Whether you choose to believe in it or not, or whether this was all luck, that's your choice. Things happen, and we do our best to try and deal with them.
Doesn't mean I have to be thrilled about it.
The beauty of it is, it's your choice how you feel about it.
....
{Silence for a long moment. Then Randall stood up.}
I'll have all the arrangements made so you don't have to worry about it, if you wish.
I... wouldn't even know where to start.
{Randall touched the young man on the shoulder, then turned and walked away, taking out a cell phone, one of those old flip phones.}
Yes, I'd like to speak with child services please. No, it's not about any pending case. It's about one that will be coming across your desk very soon. I'd like to save you some time, and make that a priority, so we can get this matter resolved quickly. Yes, I know it's unorthodox, but there's a young man here who lost everything, I don't think he's much concerned with paperwork. Sometimes you just need to forgo formality and let people get back to the things that matter to them before it spirals out of control. ..... I knew you'd see it my way. Thank you for your understanding.
=========================================
"You know, Pooler, I stood in that ring, and handed you a large sum of money that in turn helped clear a debt that wasn't yours to begin with. I did that for exactly the reasons I stated, I wanted you at your best, unhindered by distractions. Whether you took it because you believe in what I said is absolutely irrelevant, or if you just saw it as a way to stop trying to find an answer on your own, is all on your concience. You had lost your honor, and I was showing you there was a way you could get it back. You were letting another man's actions dictate your own, and I said, here, don't do that.
You took what was offered, graciously, with a grain of salt, and you were supposed to go back to doing what your heart told you.
So, yes, I attacked you afterwards, because as a man, your honor is always under attack by somebody. Someone is always trying to get you to do what they decide you should, or what they need from you. I hoped you would see that, and it would force you to remember who Bob Pooler really is, rather than who everybody wants Bob Pooler to be.
Then you opened your mouth this week, and showed me exactly how you lost your honor in the first place.
Self righteousness is not honor. Clearly, you have no idea what honor actually is. People think honor is about fairness, goodness and trust, when in reality it's about none of those things. It's about standing up, taking responsibility of your own hand, and doing what you feel is right, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Every step I have taken has been exactly that.
What's hypocritical is for a man with absolutely no honor, telling me that I have lost my own, when clearly his mouth opens to spout words before his brain has even considered them.
You may view the Empire as some group of guys doing Spikes bidding, that simply makes you naive. Spike came to us, and said, this is our purpose, do you agree? And we did. IWF was clinging to the shadows of it's past, repeating the same motions that lead nCw into it's final stages of death. Allowing a man like Xavier Cross to spit all over their traditions, then waltz in and be welcomed with open arms.
I have no love for Alex Jones as a person, but he spent years with a single dream in mind, and when he achieved that dream, Xavier Cross shattered it. Not for any kind of purpose other than to give him the finger on the last fleeting moments of a company that Alex bled for. A company that Xavier Cross walked in and out of more times than Donald Trump as had marriages.
Where was the honor in not making him pay for his sins?
See, right there, a reason for why I stood there and watched a man pay for his transgressions. But you answer me something..
Why are you standing at Spikes side?
If your answer is loyalty, then you'll deserve every inch of that knife he buries deep in your back, because make no mistake about it, when he no longer needs you, you shall suffer the same supposed fate as I. Same as Cable, same as Ryan Blade and the same as Lance and Killian will feel. To tell me that you can have any kind of trust for a man who betrays people when it suits him, and then mock me for understanding that I wasn't his friend or even trusted, is just foolish and idiotic.
Something I'm sure many people over the length of your career have learned to expect out of you.
My honor was never lost Pooler, not once. I need not justify my actions to anyone, much less a naive mewling child who assumes they know everything about me. Here's a fact Pooler, and I'm going to say this really slowly so you can follow along. Maybe the guys editing can do one of those subtitle things with a bright yellow bouncing ball so you really can focus.
You. Are. Not. Important. The. Title. Is. Not. Important.
Do you get it now? No, of course not, because you're still focused on the fact that any of this can't possibly be about anyone but you. I don't care about the belt, nor does it concern me that you have it. What concerns me as a man who stole a mask, a mask that means more to wrestling than any match you ever have or any title you ever will win does.
A mask that is uncorruptible, unbreakable, and not even death can change it.
Angel wants that belt, clearly. If I have it, I will have a key to get to him, and make him pay for his crimes, the same way Xavier Cross paid for his. I don't expect you to understand at all, I expect you to be a naive moron, dancing along to the tune of self righteous indignation, pretending that you have all the answers when you can't even comprehend the questions. The mask, either that one or this one, isn't a gimmick.
Gjenrei is a way of life.
Masayoshi is a warning.
But please, continue to tell me all about me, after all you've been playing characters for so long it hardly seems fitting to try to deny you something you've apparently begun to believe you're actually good at. Apparently being Bob Pooler was just far too hard for you, so you've made up an alternate Bob who's a dedicated lover at home but this vicious cutthroat at work.
You know those people? We call them actors. Because their lives are fake.
Say whatever ridiculousness strikes your fancy, but your every action wreaks of falsehoods and lunacy. To call me honorless, because I stood by a man with a purpose, when you stand by that same man for a reason nobody can define, just shows how foolishly weak you are. I was removed because Spike fears he isn't the biggest dog in the yard anymore. That my enemies may become his enemies by association. So he threw me to the wolves.
Think it can't happen to you? Keep holding that title. You'll see.
It's not hypocrisy if it's truth. I'll stand by my actions from now until judgment day. As a man who often has brought up his own regrets, you cannot say the same. Your honor was gone the day you forgot who Bob Pooler is and started being alternate Bob. And no amount of play acting or attempting to speak for me changes that.
Justice isn't about you.
The Empire isn't about you.
IWF isn't about you.
Nothing, is about you.
You don't have the strength to change it. But keep playing pretend, children aught have need of distractions."
===============================
-----Now-----
Seems like a long time, and yet.. not long enough.
A man never gets over suffering from things that aren't within his realm of control, the idea is to accept that it lies outside our reach, and use it as a compass to guide us to keep what's within our control, as true as it can be.
...Heh.. sounds like something he'd say.
He wasn't just fond of pushing ancient wisdom on just you, you know. Point is, when you live life as though regret makes things ok again, you forget that regret itself colors your vision.
The problem with regret, is that it robs you of the ability to understand what you should do, what you need to do, and what should be done, because you will always fear more regret.
That almost sounded like him, too. Well, now that I know everything is ok over there, I need to get back to listening to your mother whine about her facebook friends. This social media nonsense will be the death of me yet.
Oh it's going to take more than funny cat pictures to do you in. Give her my regards.
I will. You take care now.
...Randall.
Yes?
Thanks... for standing there when no-one else seemed to be bothered.
It was what felt right at the time. To this day... still does.
Very words I live by.
Hello?
Hello, Chris.
Hello, sir.
I suppose that's better than Mister.
{For all his compassion, the man who adopted Gjenrei seemed to understand very little how his mind operated. But Gjenrei let that pass.}
Hello, Father. How nice to hear from you.
Now I think you're just messing with me, but that's probably just in my head. I was just wondering something.
Yes?
I was going over the financials and I noticed that there was a large sum of money transferred, signed by you. It's not a problem, of course. But I was wondering if you were.. ok.. over there.
{Gjenrei was unsurprised. Randall was a man who knew the concept of personal responsibility, and understood that you could blame anyone you liked for negative things, but if you did nothing to stop them yourself, you had nobody to blame but the one who failed to act.}
I, am fine, Father. A colleague of mine got into some hot water, owed money from a civil judgment he had nothing to do with. So, I offered to help him out.
Good old American legal system, eh? Everything settled now?
Yes.
{Gjenrei wasn't about to try explaining the whole situation with Pooler, and Randall seemed disinclined to ask for a complete explanation. There was a long silence.}
Has it really been as long as it has? 12 years now?
{The question caught the man in the mask off guard. Randall had never seemed to be one for calling to simply reminisce over old things long since past. Thoughts immediately returned to the past...}
-----Forever Ago - Japan-----
(All conversations are in Japanese, with helpful subtitles.)
{A young man sat in a chair, staring mutely at the floor. The people in the hospital shuffled around him, tending to their duties, paying him no mind. There was no news to give him, no status updates to inform him, his part was already over.
Tragedy be not undone by wishful thinking.
A man approached, looking strangely amiss in a navy suit in the sea of white and green hospital garb. Somber, etched on his aging face, he took a seat next to the young man.}
I'm sorry, Kurohito.. I just got word.
....Nothing can be done now. But I appreciate the sentiment, thank you.
{The young man's eyes didn't leave the floor, and the man didn't seem to know what to do. How did you comfort someone who just lost his entire world, before his life even truly began?}
Are you ok...?
I.. I should have been with them. I was.. supposed to be.
{Randall was unsure what to say. The trip was supposed to be a big outing of all the families from the company. He himself had to cancel last minute, as Elizabeth had taken ill from one silly thing or another. Had she not, he might have been carpooling with the family that had just been lost, and it may have been different. But telling him that wouldn't have much effect on now, would it?}
Things happen as they will, perhaps there was a reason you chose not to, just as there may have been a reason for us deciding to cancel this trip. Or we're just lucky, life has funny ways of working out.
I'm finding it difficult to believe that any sort of higher power is controlling the way this is ending. If so.. I have a few choice words for him.. or it..
I don't doubt that you do. Whether you choose to believe in it or not, or whether this was all luck, that's your choice. Things happen, and we do our best to try and deal with them.
Doesn't mean I have to be thrilled about it.
The beauty of it is, it's your choice how you feel about it.
....
{Silence for a long moment. Then Randall stood up.}
I'll have all the arrangements made so you don't have to worry about it, if you wish.
I... wouldn't even know where to start.
{Randall touched the young man on the shoulder, then turned and walked away, taking out a cell phone, one of those old flip phones.}
Yes, I'd like to speak with child services please. No, it's not about any pending case. It's about one that will be coming across your desk very soon. I'd like to save you some time, and make that a priority, so we can get this matter resolved quickly. Yes, I know it's unorthodox, but there's a young man here who lost everything, I don't think he's much concerned with paperwork. Sometimes you just need to forgo formality and let people get back to the things that matter to them before it spirals out of control. ..... I knew you'd see it my way. Thank you for your understanding.
=========================================
"You know, Pooler, I stood in that ring, and handed you a large sum of money that in turn helped clear a debt that wasn't yours to begin with. I did that for exactly the reasons I stated, I wanted you at your best, unhindered by distractions. Whether you took it because you believe in what I said is absolutely irrelevant, or if you just saw it as a way to stop trying to find an answer on your own, is all on your concience. You had lost your honor, and I was showing you there was a way you could get it back. You were letting another man's actions dictate your own, and I said, here, don't do that.
You took what was offered, graciously, with a grain of salt, and you were supposed to go back to doing what your heart told you.
So, yes, I attacked you afterwards, because as a man, your honor is always under attack by somebody. Someone is always trying to get you to do what they decide you should, or what they need from you. I hoped you would see that, and it would force you to remember who Bob Pooler really is, rather than who everybody wants Bob Pooler to be.
Then you opened your mouth this week, and showed me exactly how you lost your honor in the first place.
Self righteousness is not honor. Clearly, you have no idea what honor actually is. People think honor is about fairness, goodness and trust, when in reality it's about none of those things. It's about standing up, taking responsibility of your own hand, and doing what you feel is right, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Every step I have taken has been exactly that.
What's hypocritical is for a man with absolutely no honor, telling me that I have lost my own, when clearly his mouth opens to spout words before his brain has even considered them.
You may view the Empire as some group of guys doing Spikes bidding, that simply makes you naive. Spike came to us, and said, this is our purpose, do you agree? And we did. IWF was clinging to the shadows of it's past, repeating the same motions that lead nCw into it's final stages of death. Allowing a man like Xavier Cross to spit all over their traditions, then waltz in and be welcomed with open arms.
I have no love for Alex Jones as a person, but he spent years with a single dream in mind, and when he achieved that dream, Xavier Cross shattered it. Not for any kind of purpose other than to give him the finger on the last fleeting moments of a company that Alex bled for. A company that Xavier Cross walked in and out of more times than Donald Trump as had marriages.
Where was the honor in not making him pay for his sins?
See, right there, a reason for why I stood there and watched a man pay for his transgressions. But you answer me something..
Why are you standing at Spikes side?
If your answer is loyalty, then you'll deserve every inch of that knife he buries deep in your back, because make no mistake about it, when he no longer needs you, you shall suffer the same supposed fate as I. Same as Cable, same as Ryan Blade and the same as Lance and Killian will feel. To tell me that you can have any kind of trust for a man who betrays people when it suits him, and then mock me for understanding that I wasn't his friend or even trusted, is just foolish and idiotic.
Something I'm sure many people over the length of your career have learned to expect out of you.
My honor was never lost Pooler, not once. I need not justify my actions to anyone, much less a naive mewling child who assumes they know everything about me. Here's a fact Pooler, and I'm going to say this really slowly so you can follow along. Maybe the guys editing can do one of those subtitle things with a bright yellow bouncing ball so you really can focus.
You. Are. Not. Important. The. Title. Is. Not. Important.
Do you get it now? No, of course not, because you're still focused on the fact that any of this can't possibly be about anyone but you. I don't care about the belt, nor does it concern me that you have it. What concerns me as a man who stole a mask, a mask that means more to wrestling than any match you ever have or any title you ever will win does.
A mask that is uncorruptible, unbreakable, and not even death can change it.
Angel wants that belt, clearly. If I have it, I will have a key to get to him, and make him pay for his crimes, the same way Xavier Cross paid for his. I don't expect you to understand at all, I expect you to be a naive moron, dancing along to the tune of self righteous indignation, pretending that you have all the answers when you can't even comprehend the questions. The mask, either that one or this one, isn't a gimmick.
Gjenrei is a way of life.
Masayoshi is a warning.
But please, continue to tell me all about me, after all you've been playing characters for so long it hardly seems fitting to try to deny you something you've apparently begun to believe you're actually good at. Apparently being Bob Pooler was just far too hard for you, so you've made up an alternate Bob who's a dedicated lover at home but this vicious cutthroat at work.
You know those people? We call them actors. Because their lives are fake.
Say whatever ridiculousness strikes your fancy, but your every action wreaks of falsehoods and lunacy. To call me honorless, because I stood by a man with a purpose, when you stand by that same man for a reason nobody can define, just shows how foolishly weak you are. I was removed because Spike fears he isn't the biggest dog in the yard anymore. That my enemies may become his enemies by association. So he threw me to the wolves.
Think it can't happen to you? Keep holding that title. You'll see.
It's not hypocrisy if it's truth. I'll stand by my actions from now until judgment day. As a man who often has brought up his own regrets, you cannot say the same. Your honor was gone the day you forgot who Bob Pooler is and started being alternate Bob. And no amount of play acting or attempting to speak for me changes that.
Justice isn't about you.
The Empire isn't about you.
IWF isn't about you.
Nothing, is about you.
You don't have the strength to change it. But keep playing pretend, children aught have need of distractions."
===============================
-----Now-----
Seems like a long time, and yet.. not long enough.
A man never gets over suffering from things that aren't within his realm of control, the idea is to accept that it lies outside our reach, and use it as a compass to guide us to keep what's within our control, as true as it can be.
...Heh.. sounds like something he'd say.
He wasn't just fond of pushing ancient wisdom on just you, you know. Point is, when you live life as though regret makes things ok again, you forget that regret itself colors your vision.
The problem with regret, is that it robs you of the ability to understand what you should do, what you need to do, and what should be done, because you will always fear more regret.
That almost sounded like him, too. Well, now that I know everything is ok over there, I need to get back to listening to your mother whine about her facebook friends. This social media nonsense will be the death of me yet.
Oh it's going to take more than funny cat pictures to do you in. Give her my regards.
I will. You take care now.
...Randall.
Yes?
Thanks... for standing there when no-one else seemed to be bothered.
It was what felt right at the time. To this day... still does.
Very words I live by.
Well howdy there pardner.