Whatever

[Crystal Zdunich]

So I guess this is it. The big time. Another PPV and another chance to showcase that I deserve to be in the main event which is exactly the place that I am currently in. You know I don’t know what to say anymore because whatever I say it won’t be taken seriously. It never does anymore. There are some who could be filled with so much joy and enthusiasm they could really believe in their own hype.

Yes I am referring to you Fiona. You seem to really buy into the fact that you have a chance but the truth of the reality is that might be the worst wrestler that is walking into this match. Yet I don’t know how you can honestly do it?

I don’t know how you can walk into this match as the little engine that could. As a woman who has gotten her ass handed to her in almost every single outing and still find it in her to come out to her next match ready to make a difference. Ready to fight like the last match never happened.

I will admit that you might just be stronger than me Fiona when it comes to taking losses, and I am at the point in my career where I can really see what everyone else sees in me. Whereas you take each lost in stride. I just can’t get over the fact of beating myself down. Of never looking past the last match and I feel just so awful coming into this match.

I thought that Metamorphosis was going to be my night and that just wasn’t the case but here I am at Danger Zone and I have absolutely no confidence going into this match. Pray that you never are in the situation that I am in Fiona because I am just at the point where I want to give it up.

I haven’t won a single match since that last Pay Per View and it’s a damn shame because I know I have all of the ability in the world to be a top tier wrestler. I know it’s somewhere deep inside of me but after losing so much. After not delivering on my promises I feel like a woman who has lost her way and doesn’t know how to find her way again.

Never stop smiling Fiona… Because the moment you do is the moment that you are going to lose all of your confidence. It’s going to be the moment where you will become your own worst enemy and I don’t think the world needs another Crystal Hilton.

Surpass me. Be better than me. Do whatever you need to do but never lose sight of who you are because eventually all of that hard work is going to eventually pay off.

Trust me on this one. You have no problem speaking your mind and fighting your battles all the way to the end and that’s something I respect about you. Never change Fiona.

You have a good head on your shoulders and you just need to keep focused on what you want to do.







Usually I would be a woman that would be full of so much life. Full of so much to say. Full of so much lip but right now I feel broken and beyond the point of repair. It’s one thing to lose in one match and trying to find a way to bounce back from that lost but my record in big title matches is just flat out awful and I doubt anything will change going into this match. Especially when I stare at the level of competition that is also featured in this match.

Besides the likes of Fiona who I have managed to beat in the past. All of these other women are women that have decimated me in the confines of the ring. Eliza, Alexis, and Eternity, and each of them have had their special ways at doing so.

Alexis I guess considering you are the champion you might be gunning to be the absolute best of all time. You have a title reign that is looking to decimate the previous record and with the Garcias constantly watching your back. You could potentially have that title for a very long time.

You have aligned yourself with the right people and after being jumped so much maybe the Garcias might be the future of the business. I know the point of a cage match is to keep them out of the match and it’s honestly a level playing field but seeing the way you held the championship.

You really are that of an opportunist, and you could potentially hold that belt for a very long time.

A few weeks ago I thought I was better than what I actually was. I thought I could let my ego take me far in this company but after getting demolished to the likes of that 3 on 1 handicapped elimination match I really don’t know anymore. I don’t know if I am cut out to take this level of abuse over and over again.

Having the Garcias attack me every single week. It’s getting annoying and I just want it to stop.

I want it all to stop!

You know how annoying it is to listen to everyone talk down about me week in and week out. You know how much it drives a girl to the brink of insanity to hear how everyone thinks she is a has been. How she can’t cut it, how she doesn’t deserve to be in the ring anymore?

You Alexis have been one of the major culprits of saying that about me and it’s one thing for you to say it and it’s another for me to actually believe in it and at this stage I feel like everything you guys are saying are all truth… and sometimes the truth does indeed hurt.

But it’s whatever. If you win it’s not like I would be shocked. After all after I won my HALF of a ruby title you were the one I lost too in that week after winning, and now losing to you seems to be a common trend. So why should I stop now?

Or how about Eternity the woman who brought that damn doll to torment me in ways. The woman who put me on a shelf and now you are going to lock me inside a cage with her?

And then there’s Eliza the woman who stopped me when I was on my little roll and I haven’t managed to beat her yet.

Where do I go from here? Honestly I don’t know but a Crystal will no passion isn’t nothing really. I don’t know if I have it in me to get out of the cage. I don’t know how well I will do in this upcoming match.

But I will arrive get my ass kicked and at least show I can fight.

After all that’s what I get paid to do right?

Yeah… Fuck this… Turn the fucking camera off...