Post by Fiona McFly on Jul 17, 2017 4:21:30 GMT
FIONA'S JOURNAL
12 July 2017
My temperament has always been my strength.
I've worn it like a badge of honour, much like the locket I display on my neck every single morning I go out into the world. I've utilised it to guide me through my darkest hours in the IWF, taking on friends and foes alike in a never-ending struggle for dominance in a place rife with chaos and internal strife. With each passing day, I've found myself living in the moment, enjoying every singular minute of me life 'cos, as I've learned over the years, I'm not granted a "tomorrow," that I've got to make each day I spend on the plant count for something.
Yet on the same token, my temperament has always been my biggest weakness.
I've had moments in time where my anger's gotten the better of me. I've found myself doing some extraordinarily horrific things, mainly due in no small part to the rage I've felt inside my heart since Night of the Immortals. Even worse, me blood boils every day upon seeing the sight of a dear friend and mentor of mine cooped up in bed, dealing with a cancer that's robbed her of her physical strength. When Kate Steele, my tag-partner this week, decided to ambush me from behind at Bloody Assizes, it only confirmed how I'd been feeling for months on end...
...out of focus, out of control.
Through it all, I've found myself coming to one simple conclusion...that I should possess the right thinking. I've ALWAYS considered myself a fighter through and through, yet I haven't always remained straight and steady. With the Heiress to the Throne series in full swing--as well as what I'm going through personally--it's only fitting that I remind the Imperial world just what it is that TRULY makes me tick...
...that I get back up when I'm seemingly down and out.
That I NEVER, EVER quit or cower to anyone!
That I always remember the things that helped me grow.
With those in mind, let's start with you Helena.
I still haven't gotten the image out of me head--the moment you ripped me top off, an accident that could have just as easily happened to you like it did to me. In the end however, I've only begun to realise this one notion--you humiliated me. You left me to deal with the adult entertainment trolls who would stop at nothing to profit off of my body by having me pose for some rotten magazine that nobody would want to read anyway...
...and leaving my conscience filled with the need for vengeance.
But you know something MIss Sawyer? I'm BETTER than that, 'cos even though I come from a wartorn homeland, I will never alow myself to succumb to revenge. i will NEVER allow the image of that night in question to bother me anymore. Instead...I'm going to let me work do the talking and prove to YOU--and the people--that I have the heart and desire to become Heiress to the Throne and, eventually, Diamonds Champion...
...and I want that Championship really, REALLY BAD!!!
But now, onlo your partner Abigail.
Miss Spencer, I want to be straight with you. I know absolutely nothing about you; in fact, I don't even recall that you and I have ever met in a ring before. Yet deep within my soul, I firmly believe that you remind me of...me when I get angry. You've got a very vicious and violent temperament about you, and believe me when I say that you will stop at nothing to make sure people fall in line or else. After all...I've found that you and I are both prone to anger, right?
Well...herein lies the problem.
Anger, as Miss Kimble would often tell me, is merely a part of human nature, and in the heat of the moment, it's easy to feel that way whenever someone perceives you different from how you view yourself. Yet in your case...you leave your inner rage unchecked, unfiltered, and if you turn it inward, it becomes a foe that you can NOT defeat! I won't let you anger me, I won't let you tear me apart, but I'm going to SHOW you just how much focus you're really going to need in order for you to fully learn the lesson I just passed onto you...
...and believe me, you WILL learn to grow in a heartbeat.
But it won't be easy for you--I'm not gonna make it that way!
Cheerio!
~~~
~Verse 1~
When the world,
tears itself apart;
I feel the anger,
deep in my heart.
I close my eyes and try to find,
I struggle to keep control;
the fury that burns my mind,
the hared piercing my soul
I long for your strength and love,
to help me fly high like a white dove..
~~~
8 July 2017 + 1330 GMT
REGINA KIMBLE'S HOUSE + SOMEWHERE IN THE ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE
It felt strange for Fiona McFly to be back on a farm.
Even after being away from her own ancestral land in Northern Ireland for so many years, to her Regina Kimble's house, on the countryside west of London, felt like "home."
We find Fiona, on this damp Saturday afternoon, toiling away in the kitchen as she makes the perfect cup of tea for Miss Kiimble. It wasn't the -best- kitchen to work in--nothing compared to the one in McFly's Arlington, Texas home--but, in her mind, it served an adequate purpose. Placing the piping hot mug on a mid-sized serving tray, along with a plate chock full of classic British scones, Fiona slowly tiptoed out of the kitchen, through a narrow corridor which led to Miss Kimble's bedroom.
On this day, we find Miss Kimble lying snug in bed, feeling unwell with a slight bronchial ailment but otherwise, in spite of her condition, in very high spirits as Fiona set the tray gently on an adjustable desk, moving it so it was positioned directly over the former teacher's body.
FIONA MCFLY:
Is this tea to your satisfaction? I put in just a dash of sweet cream, like you wanted.
Miss Kimble, with a wink and a smile, slowly grabbed her mug's handle and took a sip, nodding in approval.
MISS KIMBLE:
Ahhh...you did good there, thank you. Come to think of it, when you and Jack reach the mid-50s in age and wind up bedridden, the lot of you won't look good either!
Regina chuckled, her deadpan (and sometimes morbid) sense of humour coming into play. Yet deep in Fiona's soul, she knew full-well that the once-thriving educator's cancer had, at this point in time, fully robbed her of the ability to enjoy even a simple walk in the great outdoors.
It pained Fiona to see her mentor, her friend, in this condition yet she shouldered on, inquiring about the teacher's work behind a recording studio microphone a few days back.
FIONA:
How was it, the recording?
MISS KIMBLE:
Nigel said I didn't need a second take. Honestly, I felt like I was back in the classroom, doing what I loved for so long, believe me I loved every minute of it, every word...
Fiona's eyes peered upon Kimble's warm smile, even though the latter's gravelly tone of voice was a far cry from the vibrant one she exhibited throughout her teaching career.
MISS KIMBLE:
Speaking of words, I heard yelling outside after I finished. What happened with you and Jack...?
Fiona closed her eyes, unsure whether or not she wanted to answer the question. The memories of that July 5th day had permeated itself deep into her consciousness--the accusation, the slap, and the somewhat sanctimonious lecture on things such as humility. She wanted to fib about the whole ordeal, but she realised, then and there, it would be wrong to do so.
So Fiona spoke up, her voice almost in a stammer as she recounted the incident in question.
FIONA:
I don't know what came upon me. I was screaming at Jack, then I...I-I-I struck him. It was sudden, quick...
Regina calmly placed her left hand on the trembling Fiona's arm, trying to calm her down.
MISS KIMBLE:
Dear, oh dear...what'd he say?
FIONA:
He accused me of trying to use you to promote the album. I just...I-I-I don't know if he's in his right frame of mind. He's been cantankerous ever since he found out he couldn't work full-time anymore. It's gotten worse within the last few months or so, since your diagnosis.
Fiona paused for a moment, watching as Regina took a scone off her plate and placed it in her mouth, loving its sweet flavour.
FIONA:
I realise now that he's very protective of you--he's known you thirty years, you helped his father when his mum died in that crash. He just...he m-m-makes me so angry sometimes 'cos he thinks, in his mind, you can't do anything without fear of overworking yourself.
Regina nodded, adjusting the desk so that it would move away from her.
MISS KIMBLE:
Here's my take on the matter. I firmly believe Jack understands that I'm not going to be around much longer, for he's always talked to me when he felt low inside. You, on the other hand, want to show people that you really do care about them, that any misconceptions they make will cause you to lose your self-control. My former principal, Mr. Morita, always had a saying..."possess the right thinking." Only then will you and Jack receive the blessings of strength, knowledge, and peace.
Fiona kept her eyes wide shut, her trembling subsiding as she listened intently to the wise woman's words.
MISS KIMBLE:
We all feel things like anger and rage at some time in our lives. Often, our blood boils when we think we're protecting the people we love and care about, yet we lash out whenever someone says something perceived as a falsehood. It's just a part of human nature, but if you leae it unchecked, anger will cloud your udgement and become an unbeatable enemy. You and Jack are special because you choose to fight this enemy together, but as you do...don't ever forget the true forces that brought you two together from the beginning.
Fiona's face, on the surface, was stoic.
Yet deep in her mind, she was sobbing.
She let her ailing mentor's words slowly sink in, the ambiance of the bedroom allowing her to take in a precise, solitary period of solemn reflection. She pondered what these "forces" were in bringing her husband, Jack Gaither, into her very consciousness, but all she drew from that train of throught was a giant blank.
It was a question that Fiona had to figure out for herself.
~TO BE CONTINUED~
12 July 2017
My temperament has always been my strength.
I've worn it like a badge of honour, much like the locket I display on my neck every single morning I go out into the world. I've utilised it to guide me through my darkest hours in the IWF, taking on friends and foes alike in a never-ending struggle for dominance in a place rife with chaos and internal strife. With each passing day, I've found myself living in the moment, enjoying every singular minute of me life 'cos, as I've learned over the years, I'm not granted a "tomorrow," that I've got to make each day I spend on the plant count for something.
Yet on the same token, my temperament has always been my biggest weakness.
I've had moments in time where my anger's gotten the better of me. I've found myself doing some extraordinarily horrific things, mainly due in no small part to the rage I've felt inside my heart since Night of the Immortals. Even worse, me blood boils every day upon seeing the sight of a dear friend and mentor of mine cooped up in bed, dealing with a cancer that's robbed her of her physical strength. When Kate Steele, my tag-partner this week, decided to ambush me from behind at Bloody Assizes, it only confirmed how I'd been feeling for months on end...
...out of focus, out of control.
Through it all, I've found myself coming to one simple conclusion...that I should possess the right thinking. I've ALWAYS considered myself a fighter through and through, yet I haven't always remained straight and steady. With the Heiress to the Throne series in full swing--as well as what I'm going through personally--it's only fitting that I remind the Imperial world just what it is that TRULY makes me tick...
...that I get back up when I'm seemingly down and out.
That I NEVER, EVER quit or cower to anyone!
That I always remember the things that helped me grow.
With those in mind, let's start with you Helena.
I still haven't gotten the image out of me head--the moment you ripped me top off, an accident that could have just as easily happened to you like it did to me. In the end however, I've only begun to realise this one notion--you humiliated me. You left me to deal with the adult entertainment trolls who would stop at nothing to profit off of my body by having me pose for some rotten magazine that nobody would want to read anyway...
...and leaving my conscience filled with the need for vengeance.
But you know something MIss Sawyer? I'm BETTER than that, 'cos even though I come from a wartorn homeland, I will never alow myself to succumb to revenge. i will NEVER allow the image of that night in question to bother me anymore. Instead...I'm going to let me work do the talking and prove to YOU--and the people--that I have the heart and desire to become Heiress to the Throne and, eventually, Diamonds Champion...
...and I want that Championship really, REALLY BAD!!!
But now, onlo your partner Abigail.
Miss Spencer, I want to be straight with you. I know absolutely nothing about you; in fact, I don't even recall that you and I have ever met in a ring before. Yet deep within my soul, I firmly believe that you remind me of...me when I get angry. You've got a very vicious and violent temperament about you, and believe me when I say that you will stop at nothing to make sure people fall in line or else. After all...I've found that you and I are both prone to anger, right?
Well...herein lies the problem.
Anger, as Miss Kimble would often tell me, is merely a part of human nature, and in the heat of the moment, it's easy to feel that way whenever someone perceives you different from how you view yourself. Yet in your case...you leave your inner rage unchecked, unfiltered, and if you turn it inward, it becomes a foe that you can NOT defeat! I won't let you anger me, I won't let you tear me apart, but I'm going to SHOW you just how much focus you're really going to need in order for you to fully learn the lesson I just passed onto you...
...and believe me, you WILL learn to grow in a heartbeat.
But it won't be easy for you--I'm not gonna make it that way!
Cheerio!
~~~
~Verse 1~
When the world,
tears itself apart;
I feel the anger,
deep in my heart.
I close my eyes and try to find,
I struggle to keep control;
the fury that burns my mind,
the hared piercing my soul
I long for your strength and love,
to help me fly high like a white dove..
~~~
8 July 2017 + 1330 GMT
REGINA KIMBLE'S HOUSE + SOMEWHERE IN THE ENGLISH COUNTRYSIDE
It felt strange for Fiona McFly to be back on a farm.
Even after being away from her own ancestral land in Northern Ireland for so many years, to her Regina Kimble's house, on the countryside west of London, felt like "home."
We find Fiona, on this damp Saturday afternoon, toiling away in the kitchen as she makes the perfect cup of tea for Miss Kiimble. It wasn't the -best- kitchen to work in--nothing compared to the one in McFly's Arlington, Texas home--but, in her mind, it served an adequate purpose. Placing the piping hot mug on a mid-sized serving tray, along with a plate chock full of classic British scones, Fiona slowly tiptoed out of the kitchen, through a narrow corridor which led to Miss Kimble's bedroom.
On this day, we find Miss Kimble lying snug in bed, feeling unwell with a slight bronchial ailment but otherwise, in spite of her condition, in very high spirits as Fiona set the tray gently on an adjustable desk, moving it so it was positioned directly over the former teacher's body.
FIONA MCFLY:
Is this tea to your satisfaction? I put in just a dash of sweet cream, like you wanted.
Miss Kimble, with a wink and a smile, slowly grabbed her mug's handle and took a sip, nodding in approval.
MISS KIMBLE:
Ahhh...you did good there, thank you. Come to think of it, when you and Jack reach the mid-50s in age and wind up bedridden, the lot of you won't look good either!
Regina chuckled, her deadpan (and sometimes morbid) sense of humour coming into play. Yet deep in Fiona's soul, she knew full-well that the once-thriving educator's cancer had, at this point in time, fully robbed her of the ability to enjoy even a simple walk in the great outdoors.
It pained Fiona to see her mentor, her friend, in this condition yet she shouldered on, inquiring about the teacher's work behind a recording studio microphone a few days back.
FIONA:
How was it, the recording?
MISS KIMBLE:
Nigel said I didn't need a second take. Honestly, I felt like I was back in the classroom, doing what I loved for so long, believe me I loved every minute of it, every word...
Fiona's eyes peered upon Kimble's warm smile, even though the latter's gravelly tone of voice was a far cry from the vibrant one she exhibited throughout her teaching career.
MISS KIMBLE:
Speaking of words, I heard yelling outside after I finished. What happened with you and Jack...?
Fiona closed her eyes, unsure whether or not she wanted to answer the question. The memories of that July 5th day had permeated itself deep into her consciousness--the accusation, the slap, and the somewhat sanctimonious lecture on things such as humility. She wanted to fib about the whole ordeal, but she realised, then and there, it would be wrong to do so.
So Fiona spoke up, her voice almost in a stammer as she recounted the incident in question.
FIONA:
I don't know what came upon me. I was screaming at Jack, then I...I-I-I struck him. It was sudden, quick...
Regina calmly placed her left hand on the trembling Fiona's arm, trying to calm her down.
MISS KIMBLE:
Dear, oh dear...what'd he say?
FIONA:
He accused me of trying to use you to promote the album. I just...I-I-I don't know if he's in his right frame of mind. He's been cantankerous ever since he found out he couldn't work full-time anymore. It's gotten worse within the last few months or so, since your diagnosis.
Fiona paused for a moment, watching as Regina took a scone off her plate and placed it in her mouth, loving its sweet flavour.
FIONA:
I realise now that he's very protective of you--he's known you thirty years, you helped his father when his mum died in that crash. He just...he m-m-makes me so angry sometimes 'cos he thinks, in his mind, you can't do anything without fear of overworking yourself.
Regina nodded, adjusting the desk so that it would move away from her.
MISS KIMBLE:
Here's my take on the matter. I firmly believe Jack understands that I'm not going to be around much longer, for he's always talked to me when he felt low inside. You, on the other hand, want to show people that you really do care about them, that any misconceptions they make will cause you to lose your self-control. My former principal, Mr. Morita, always had a saying..."possess the right thinking." Only then will you and Jack receive the blessings of strength, knowledge, and peace.
Fiona kept her eyes wide shut, her trembling subsiding as she listened intently to the wise woman's words.
MISS KIMBLE:
We all feel things like anger and rage at some time in our lives. Often, our blood boils when we think we're protecting the people we love and care about, yet we lash out whenever someone says something perceived as a falsehood. It's just a part of human nature, but if you leae it unchecked, anger will cloud your udgement and become an unbeatable enemy. You and Jack are special because you choose to fight this enemy together, but as you do...don't ever forget the true forces that brought you two together from the beginning.
Fiona's face, on the surface, was stoic.
Yet deep in her mind, she was sobbing.
She let her ailing mentor's words slowly sink in, the ambiance of the bedroom allowing her to take in a precise, solitary period of solemn reflection. She pondered what these "forces" were in bringing her husband, Jack Gaither, into her very consciousness, but all she drew from that train of throught was a giant blank.
It was a question that Fiona had to figure out for herself.
~TO BE CONTINUED~
Well howdy there pardner.