Post by Ghost Spike on Sept 21, 2013 10:54:20 GMT
Road to Redemption: Part 2 - Roadside Redemption
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*click* *whirrrrr* āAudio diary, recorded on 17th of September 2013. Subject: Michael Kane. Recording begins:ā
I never thought so many years ago that this is where I would be today. This is what I would do for a career, and that Iād be one of the best in the entire world. When I look back and think about how it all started, it seems like a whole other life time ago. Way before my twisted family came crawling out of the woodwork, way before we grabbed the wrestling business with a chokehold and refused to let go, even when we say weāre retiring. Itās that bug, that itch that finds you and brings you back no matter what. Iāve had to undergo psychiatric evaluations, Iāve had to go through rehabilitation, Iāve had to wrestle under a mask. I did and would still do anything to make sure I could do this thing, to make sure my legacy that Iāve spent seventeen years clawing, scratching and biting to get. Seventeen years agoā¦...that would have made me sixteen years old. I wasnāt even legally old enough to be doing this, something Christopher likes to throw in my face. I was wrestling in some guys backyard, school and wrestling, itās all I did. At least I had that thoughā¦.it could have been a lot worse given what I had to start with. Doctors told me different things over the years, they've said I had some form of social disorder, that I have some form of dissociative problem, and naturally paranoid schizophrenia. I've been accused of making it all up, and I've been called an outright liar, but my sessions with Doctor Griffiths have brought me to a place of serenity, a place where I can both admit what happened to me and accept it too. Recorded here are incidents from my life that have scarred my mind and formed me into the man I am today, the monster who stands before you.
So let me take you back, to when I was just a childā¦..
Itās the early days of spring outside, the sun is peaking itās head through the clouds off the coast of Northern Ireland, the sounds of the waves crashing against the beach and the rocks below bring me from my slumber. I remember it fondly, the days when my brother and I would go down to the beach and try and find some crabs, or even a jellyfish or two. One time a dolphin was washed up on the shore, Brad and I made sure it got back into the sea, but mom and dad werenāt best pleased with us for wading so far out into the sea. Today though, it was different, because today was the day mom came home from the hospital with little baby Freya in her arms.
Or at least that is what I remember.
I know now that my memory is false, but inside my mind and inside my heart it feels so real. I can remember looking at baby Freya and feeling my heart swell with pride, I can remember looking at her and thinking to myself that I would do anything in the world to protect this little girl, to protect her from anything in the world - even my own family if need be. When I think back now, and I realise that everything she went through was because of meā¦..Iāve never felt so ashamed of myself in my life. The time that my poor Freya spent in the mental institute, was all because of me, all because of what HE made me do. I brainwashed her, made her believe the fantasy that he had sold to me so easily. We were family, we were bloodā¦...but in the end, we werenātā¦.
We were just victims of his mind games.
In my minds eye I see my mother coming home with Freya wrapped in a bundle, a pale yellow blanket. Brad seems grumpy about the whole situation, but my father is over the moon. He has a little girl who will be protected by her two older brothers. He always wanted a girl, though Iām not sure why. Sick bastard didnāt deserve to have kids in the first place. Thing is, the air is clear now, and we all know that she wasnāt his. The things he did to usā¦..each one of us, my mother, my brother, my sis-.....noā¦...how many times. I donāt have a sisterā¦...my cousin, and myself. What kind of sick bastard could do that to his family? The thing isā¦..if the memories I have of Freya are a lie, how do I know the memories of what he did to me arenāt a lie too?
How can I trust anything that comes through this fractured mind of mine?
I know I canāt, I have to take things on faith whilst Doc Griffiths helps me through these stages. The diary was meant to help, these blogs are meant to help too. Instead of writing out my daily thoughts, he wants me to write out significant parts of my life, memories, events that I feel have contributed to who I am today. For some reason this jumped out at me. Knowing what I know nowā¦...knowing that my own father tampered with my mind, screwed with my memories and did all kinds of things to try and mould me into some twisted monster to do his bidding. Why me? Why not Brad? What the hell is the difference between us? I know it sounds horrible when I say things like that, I know Brad had it rough tooā¦.and I wouldnāt wish what dad did to me on anyone. The thing is, despite it all, Iāve always had a strong sense of family, a strong bond with the people in my lifeā¦..but it just seems that time after time, it falls apart.
Like it did with SaPhirre.
Like it did with Nola.
Like it did with Zell.
Like it did with River.
Like it did with Alysson.
Am I doomed to loneliness?
*Click* Recording Ends.
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The time when I first managed to get away from that life, the pain and the torment was when some wrestling producer saw fit to put me under contract and drag me away from the back gardens and illegal arenas of Birmingham England to the back yards and bingo halls of the good old United States of America. I remember it quite well, Little Simon Dynasty saw me putting my body on the line to earn the food on my table and the roof above my head. He saw the potential I had, my capacity for violence and of course my lack of care for my own safety. He saw someone he could make money off of, and like the green wreck that I was I fell for it all and ate right out of his hands. I gave up what little I had, and set sail for the land of the free.
It was sold to me as the greatest opportunity of my life, a chance to turn what had become a way of scrambling for cash into a profession. Simon convinced me to uproot, and move to the Good āOl US of A to become a ārasslerā and promised me the moon. I learned the hard way, that this business is filled with liars, backstabbers and nasty little shits who plot behind your back. Itās very hard in this business to make friends, someone once said to me that in the wrestling business you either make friends or money - never both. To a certain degree that man was correct, at least to a point. Once youāve made enough, and paid your duesā¦.things ease off. Yet at the same time, people come at you to try and prove themselves. Iāve had it in IWF with Mike Laszlo, with Cyrus Daniels, even with Cable Arcane. However, at this time in my life, I was just a starry eyed rookie, and I fell for the line that would lead me to one of the darkest times of my life. I fell in with the wrong crowd, a motorcycle club. Felt like there was some safety in numbers, and joining gave me a roof over my head. It also gave us numbers at our shows, but Simon didnāt realise this.
Pretty soon I was spending more time with the club than I was in the ring or training, and things took a downward spiral when I began taking drugs. Things got bad, I did some bad things, and I hurt some of the closest people to me, one of which was Simon. So he did what any self respecting owner would do, he fired me. That was the wakeup call that I needed. I realised the life I was leading was taking me to a dangerous place, just like my father. That shook me to my core, I never wanted to be like him, Iād do anything to not be like him, but it seems that destiny is cruel. Merely weeks after leaving Simon and forging ahead to try and find a new job I was approached by my old man. He had a proposition for me, he wanted to bankroll a nw federation with me at the head of it.
I wish to God Iād have said no.
Then again, if I did then we wouldnāt have the likes of The Ace, or the Holland brothers. Soā¦.a mixed blessing I reckon. Needless to say it didnāt work, ever since I was a kid my father had tried to manipulate me, to force me to do things his way, and I would naturally rebel. I bounced around from federation to federation, but I learned the value of money. I learned that I never wanted to be homeless ever again. So I invested my money, I bought houses in a small village just outside of Boston. I built it up slowly over the years, and now I could live off of the rent if I really wanted to, but I canāt give this up. This is my calling..
This is my life.
I donāt know what you are expecting from these audio diaries Doc, but I hate dredging up old memories. Iām not sure what your endgame isā¦..but I think Iāve brought up enough pain for nowā¦..
*click* End of Recording.
The scene opens up with a simple camcorder set up in front of Spike Kaneās RV. Spike himself stands just in front of the door, dressed in his IWF beanie, baggy jeans, and an InFamous hooded jacket. He looks right at the camera before he begins to talk.
Spike Kane: You know, over the years people have said so many things to me, about me, and just toward me that a lot gets shoved under the rug, and a lot of false pretenses become fact in some peoples eyes. Like this idea that Spike Kane has been in the world title scene since he debuted in nCw and doesnāt deserve to have an Imperial Title shot. Let me just be clear for one minute, crystal god damn clearā¦..every single shot I have, I earn! I earned my National Title shot at Jack Manson, I earned my World Title Shot against Lance Ryan, and the ārematchā that included Joe Everyman and Trent Helms. I earned my Imperial Title shot by besting five other men, including my tag team partner whoā¦.may I add, I earned the tag team titles with by beating every single tag team this company has to offer. Think about that one, and then remember that it took a surprise attack by a bunch of cowards to take Rob out. To keep my partner away from me this Sunday Night, because if I was a betting man Iād bet that someone doesnāt want me to walk away with the Imperial Championship. Thing isā¦...they can want, they can scheme, the can cheat and bring the whole company crashing around our heads if they wantā¦..nothing is going to stop me from walking out as the Imperial Champion. Do you hear that Lex? Iām talking directly to you now punk. You will have to put me down for good Lex, and I mean it. Ten seconds wonāt be enoughā¦..youāll have to outright end me to protect that belt.
Spike steps forwards a little bit, clearly working himself up with his rant.
Spike Kane: This has been coming ever since you blindsided Joe, and we both know it. Yeah, it sucks balls that Joe isnāt here to do it himself but you know what? Joe has to learn to pay for his actions - just like you do Lex. We are all accountable for our actions, I of all people know that more than anybody else. Iāve lost everything I ever cared about except for this business and my legacy. Itās all Iāve been left with, - she took everything else. Do you not think that I would rather be at home with my son than having to face a man such as yourself in a Last Man Standing match? A man who will be looking to send a message to the masses once again. I know Lex, you did it last time when you beat me, but things have changed. My ego is in check, and your precious Imperial Title is on the line. I have absolutely nothing to lose, you have everything to lose. You see, I firmly believe that if I topple you from your perch this Sunday that your little group of Juggernauts come toppling with you, and they will crash to the groundā¦.and probably be angry looking for someone to blame. Itāll be you Lex. Lead by example, right? Do as I doā¦..so lose your title to the biggest threat on the roster - ok, maybe my ego isnāt in checkā¦..but letās be honest here Lex. Who on this roster poses a bigger threat to both your title reign AND your Juggernauts, than I do? ā¦.maybe Verona, but heās quite occupied with his Everyman project right now. Probably for the best, right? Because it allows us monsters to get down and dirty. To claw at each other, and fight until we cannot fight any more. I donāt care who I have to go through Lex. I donāt care how much you throw in my way. Iām coming for you, and Iām coming for your title.
Spike leans his head forward as he arches his body back a little to lean against the RV. The look on his face is reminiscent of the twisted glare one would see on the face of Donnie Darko.
Spike Kane: I hope you have enjoyed your time at the top of this federation Lex. I hope youāve enjoyed your time bullying the rest of the roster. It just sucks that Iām not one of those people that you can bully, doesnāt it? You, Xander, Eternityā¦.whoever your masked men are, they canāt intimidate me. Bring them out, Iāll swing for the god damn fences. Iāll take every last one of you on if I have to. I wonāt back down, I wonāt retreat. I will fight for my life, I will do what comes natural and take you all with me. Iāll kick, punch, claw, anything I can to ensure you all come crashing down. One way or another, this ends on Sunday night. No more Lex Sense Imperial Champion, no more Juggernauts. There wonāt be any talk of screw jobs, no talk of behind the scenes attacks, just talk about an outstanding match, a match of the year candidate that stole the show, and ended with my hand being raised victorious. Ended with Spike Kane being crowned the King of IWF, the Imperial Champion. Itās going to happen Lex, of that Iām certain, but you can do what you like, play the cards that you willā¦.Iāll be ready, Iāll be waitingā¦..Iāll be prepared.
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*click* *whirrrrr* āAudio diary, recorded on 17th of September 2013. Subject: Michael Kane. Recording begins:ā
I never thought so many years ago that this is where I would be today. This is what I would do for a career, and that Iād be one of the best in the entire world. When I look back and think about how it all started, it seems like a whole other life time ago. Way before my twisted family came crawling out of the woodwork, way before we grabbed the wrestling business with a chokehold and refused to let go, even when we say weāre retiring. Itās that bug, that itch that finds you and brings you back no matter what. Iāve had to undergo psychiatric evaluations, Iāve had to go through rehabilitation, Iāve had to wrestle under a mask. I did and would still do anything to make sure I could do this thing, to make sure my legacy that Iāve spent seventeen years clawing, scratching and biting to get. Seventeen years agoā¦...that would have made me sixteen years old. I wasnāt even legally old enough to be doing this, something Christopher likes to throw in my face. I was wrestling in some guys backyard, school and wrestling, itās all I did. At least I had that thoughā¦.it could have been a lot worse given what I had to start with. Doctors told me different things over the years, they've said I had some form of social disorder, that I have some form of dissociative problem, and naturally paranoid schizophrenia. I've been accused of making it all up, and I've been called an outright liar, but my sessions with Doctor Griffiths have brought me to a place of serenity, a place where I can both admit what happened to me and accept it too. Recorded here are incidents from my life that have scarred my mind and formed me into the man I am today, the monster who stands before you.
So let me take you back, to when I was just a childā¦..
Itās the early days of spring outside, the sun is peaking itās head through the clouds off the coast of Northern Ireland, the sounds of the waves crashing against the beach and the rocks below bring me from my slumber. I remember it fondly, the days when my brother and I would go down to the beach and try and find some crabs, or even a jellyfish or two. One time a dolphin was washed up on the shore, Brad and I made sure it got back into the sea, but mom and dad werenāt best pleased with us for wading so far out into the sea. Today though, it was different, because today was the day mom came home from the hospital with little baby Freya in her arms.
Or at least that is what I remember.
I know now that my memory is false, but inside my mind and inside my heart it feels so real. I can remember looking at baby Freya and feeling my heart swell with pride, I can remember looking at her and thinking to myself that I would do anything in the world to protect this little girl, to protect her from anything in the world - even my own family if need be. When I think back now, and I realise that everything she went through was because of meā¦..Iāve never felt so ashamed of myself in my life. The time that my poor Freya spent in the mental institute, was all because of me, all because of what HE made me do. I brainwashed her, made her believe the fantasy that he had sold to me so easily. We were family, we were bloodā¦...but in the end, we werenātā¦.
We were just victims of his mind games.
In my minds eye I see my mother coming home with Freya wrapped in a bundle, a pale yellow blanket. Brad seems grumpy about the whole situation, but my father is over the moon. He has a little girl who will be protected by her two older brothers. He always wanted a girl, though Iām not sure why. Sick bastard didnāt deserve to have kids in the first place. Thing is, the air is clear now, and we all know that she wasnāt his. The things he did to usā¦..each one of us, my mother, my brother, my sis-.....noā¦...how many times. I donāt have a sisterā¦...my cousin, and myself. What kind of sick bastard could do that to his family? The thing isā¦..if the memories I have of Freya are a lie, how do I know the memories of what he did to me arenāt a lie too?
How can I trust anything that comes through this fractured mind of mine?
I know I canāt, I have to take things on faith whilst Doc Griffiths helps me through these stages. The diary was meant to help, these blogs are meant to help too. Instead of writing out my daily thoughts, he wants me to write out significant parts of my life, memories, events that I feel have contributed to who I am today. For some reason this jumped out at me. Knowing what I know nowā¦...knowing that my own father tampered with my mind, screwed with my memories and did all kinds of things to try and mould me into some twisted monster to do his bidding. Why me? Why not Brad? What the hell is the difference between us? I know it sounds horrible when I say things like that, I know Brad had it rough tooā¦.and I wouldnāt wish what dad did to me on anyone. The thing is, despite it all, Iāve always had a strong sense of family, a strong bond with the people in my lifeā¦..but it just seems that time after time, it falls apart.
Like it did with SaPhirre.
Like it did with Nola.
Like it did with Zell.
Like it did with River.
Like it did with Alysson.
Am I doomed to loneliness?
*Click* Recording Ends.
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The scene reopens with the RV of Spike Kane, though this time we are inside it as it is clearly night time. Spike fumbles with the camera switching it on and trying to place it down whilst sitting on the edge of his bed with the curtains drawn.
Spike Kane: Technically Extreme Endurance is tomorrow, though itās realllllly early in the morning right now. I couldnāt sleep so I figured Iād cut a promo. Iām quite excited about tomorrow night, and Iām really looking forward to the event itself as a fan. Of course Iām eager to get in the ring with Lex and get it over and done with, but it doesnāt mean I donāt want to enjoy the rest of the show. Thereās matches that Iām looking forward to watchingā¦..but my mind is focused on Lex Sense and the Imperial Title so much that Iām not sure Iād be able to enjoy them. Especially being on second lastā¦.at least if we were on first it would be over so I could sit and watch the rest of the show with my friends, yāknow? Speaking of whichā¦.Rob got cleared by the doctors, thatās great news right? Iām not sure if heāll be able to come to Extreme Endurance though. It would mean a lot to have him in my corner for my match, but we just keep missing each other with phone calls and such. I know heās gotta be busy with Hope, and I wouldnāt be surprised if he wasnāt a little pissed at me for not being there when he got attacked. I know I felt like shit because of itā¦.but I know exactly who to take my frustrations out on, and fortunately for me itāll be tomorrow night, and itāll be Lex Sense.
Spike lowers his head as his mind is filled with thoughts and anticipation for tomorrows pay per view event and one of the biggest matches of his life.
Spike Kane: My match with Lexā¦.it signifies an important milestone in my career. I havenāt had a shot like this since 2008. Many people figured I was done, that Iād never be the ābig manā in a company ever again, and a lot of people shrugged me off because I didnāt āneedā itā¦...doesnāt mean I donāt want it. Doesnāt mean I donāt deserve it! I work my ass off, week in and week out. I fight everyone who comes my way, even my own tag team partner. Even my own family. Iām a model employee, because I tow the line, Iāve paid my dues and earned my way to where I am in this business, and Iāve always helped the younger generation take those steps. I am the kind of man who should be at the head of a company. Iāve worked extremely hard to become suchā¦..for years I was put down, told that I was ājust a hardcore wrestlerā that I would never amount to anything. Naturally, it inspired me to prove them all wrong, and boy did I. Out of the initial crop Iām the only one still here, out of the second batch, itās only Jake and I. I evolve, I adapt, and I move forward to keep myself relevant, to keep myself on the lips of everyone in this business. Iām a trendsetter.
Spike runs a hand through his hair as he leans backward on his bed. You can imagine the dreams of hundreds of early twenty year old women filling up right now. Maybe some men too. Spike continues to talk whilst laying down.
Spike Kane: Iāve been there, and done that. Everybody knows, and everybody is sick of me telling them, but the thing isā¦.you all hear me mention the past and you shut off like the ignorant fucks that you are. If I mention the past, itās for a valid reason, it means it has something to do with the present. So it might be wise for you to pay attention instead of shrugging me off, instead of underestimating me. Trust meā¦.Iāve made a career out of being underestimated. It makes things a lot easier, just like tomorrow night. Everybody is going to expect Lex to win, because heās already beaten me, because he has the Juggernauts to back him up, and because a lot of people simply donāt like me - which I understandā¦.I probably wouldnāt like me either, but I would respect me. Thereās no two ways about itā¦..you know the respect youāve got to give me. Iām a trail blazer, I made it so that people like me could become the biggest star in a federation, I made it so the ājust a hardcoreā wrestlers could thrive in this company and become some of the most loved superstars in the world. Iāve brought pain and misery to hundreds, Iāve shattered dreams, and Iāve ended careersā¦.tomorrow night I donāt want to do anything of the sort. No big threatening gestures for you Lex. I wonāt end your career, I wonāt shatter your dreamsā¦..Iāll just end your reign as Imperial Champion. Iāll make you nothing but a footnote on my own reign, just like you did to Joe.
Spike sits back up now coming closer to the camera with a big smirk on his face.
Spike Kane: Youāll realise that things come full circle Lex, and youāll realise that the night you attacked Joe - when Rob and I tried to help himā¦.you should have put me down for good, because Iām the biggest pain in the ass youāll ever encounter. Iām more violent than anyone you have ever been in the ring with, Iām the master of the Spike Impailer, the God of Xtreme, the Superstar that leaves you Thunderstruck, Iām the Don of the Denā¦...Iām Spike Kaneā¦..youāre worst enemy, and the next IWF Imperial Championā¦..whether you like it or not buddy!
And as Spike grins whilst leaning in, he flicks the switch on the camera and the feed cuts.
*click* *whirrrr* āAudio Diary, recorded on 21st of September 2013. Subject: Michael Kane. Recording begins:ā
The time when I first managed to get away from that life, the pain and the torment was when some wrestling producer saw fit to put me under contract and drag me away from the back gardens and illegal arenas of Birmingham England to the back yards and bingo halls of the good old United States of America. I remember it quite well, Little Simon Dynasty saw me putting my body on the line to earn the food on my table and the roof above my head. He saw the potential I had, my capacity for violence and of course my lack of care for my own safety. He saw someone he could make money off of, and like the green wreck that I was I fell for it all and ate right out of his hands. I gave up what little I had, and set sail for the land of the free.
It was sold to me as the greatest opportunity of my life, a chance to turn what had become a way of scrambling for cash into a profession. Simon convinced me to uproot, and move to the Good āOl US of A to become a ārasslerā and promised me the moon. I learned the hard way, that this business is filled with liars, backstabbers and nasty little shits who plot behind your back. Itās very hard in this business to make friends, someone once said to me that in the wrestling business you either make friends or money - never both. To a certain degree that man was correct, at least to a point. Once youāve made enough, and paid your duesā¦.things ease off. Yet at the same time, people come at you to try and prove themselves. Iāve had it in IWF with Mike Laszlo, with Cyrus Daniels, even with Cable Arcane. However, at this time in my life, I was just a starry eyed rookie, and I fell for the line that would lead me to one of the darkest times of my life. I fell in with the wrong crowd, a motorcycle club. Felt like there was some safety in numbers, and joining gave me a roof over my head. It also gave us numbers at our shows, but Simon didnāt realise this.
Pretty soon I was spending more time with the club than I was in the ring or training, and things took a downward spiral when I began taking drugs. Things got bad, I did some bad things, and I hurt some of the closest people to me, one of which was Simon. So he did what any self respecting owner would do, he fired me. That was the wakeup call that I needed. I realised the life I was leading was taking me to a dangerous place, just like my father. That shook me to my core, I never wanted to be like him, Iād do anything to not be like him, but it seems that destiny is cruel. Merely weeks after leaving Simon and forging ahead to try and find a new job I was approached by my old man. He had a proposition for me, he wanted to bankroll a nw federation with me at the head of it.
I wish to God Iād have said no.
Then again, if I did then we wouldnāt have the likes of The Ace, or the Holland brothers. Soā¦.a mixed blessing I reckon. Needless to say it didnāt work, ever since I was a kid my father had tried to manipulate me, to force me to do things his way, and I would naturally rebel. I bounced around from federation to federation, but I learned the value of money. I learned that I never wanted to be homeless ever again. So I invested my money, I bought houses in a small village just outside of Boston. I built it up slowly over the years, and now I could live off of the rent if I really wanted to, but I canāt give this up. This is my calling..
This is my life.
I donāt know what you are expecting from these audio diaries Doc, but I hate dredging up old memories. Iām not sure what your endgame isā¦..but I think Iāve brought up enough pain for nowā¦..
*click* End of Recording.
Well howdy there pardner.