Post by Crystal Zdunich on May 4, 2020 22:39:50 GMT
Online Blog
Hello to all of my beautiful blossoming roses out there. I just want you to know that I have been okay. Okay I have been doing better than okay. I have been living my life with the love of my wife. It’s been awesome I guess. Rayne has been calling me up and asking if I would even consider returning back to IWF and to be honest I really don’t know. I will admit it was has been somewhat amusing to see Brittany take her big step into the company.
It’s what I always wanted for my daughter. I want to see her take the next step in her wrestling career. I want her to start doing things seriously instead of doing it for a cheap thrill. Wrestling shouldn’t be about wrestling from week to week with the only thing in mind is receiving a paycheck. She should take it seriously and it honestly hurts me to just see her wasting her life away from week to week without taking it seriously.
It has been hard from me. Whenever I stepped through those ropes it has always been the same thing. It has been a case of you aren’t worthy, you don’t belong here, you are garbage, and a waste of a roster space. Some people would be offended by everything and quickly find themselves in the performance center trying to better their craft. Yet what would that do for me?!
It wouldn’t do anything for me. I feel like I have been down that road and my biggest issue would be that of inconsistency. That is my poison of choice and it has been destroying me for the past seven years that this company has been in existence. I have had two chances at superstardom in this company and both times they ended far too quickly. I was a Ruby Champion but it was basically me co-starring with somebody else, and of course there comes the comments of how I have always been the supporting actress and never the star.
It has always been the case for as long as I could remember.
EMF… I was always going to Zelda’s shadows and it’s sickening that a long time ago in NCW I was actually engaged to Steve Awesome and then she… Well… I rather not talk about it.
There was the Best Friends Club that I created and I would have had no idea that the club would basically turn on me and everything I worked so hard to establish would be gone in a matter of minutes.
Why can’t I be the star in my own movie?!
Why can’t I have that break out performance?!
Yet I am only ever worthy of being a Razzie performing beauty at best.
I appreciate that Rayne and Ayla at least believe in me but it’s really hard when I don’ even belong in myself. I have never believed in myself and I guess that’s my biggest problem in all of this.
Yet you have a woman like Fiona who actually inspires me. She is a woman who has always been through so much yet she never quit. She had always kept on fighting and she had always stepped up. She walked away for a while and when she return she really became a legit threat. What she did at Spring Knockout was extraordinary it was actually impressive and I have so much respect for her.
A part of that wishes it was me.
I wish I had that type of strength.
It’s something I need to work on but you know what maybe there is more to this unfinished story!
Maybe I can make something of myself and I won’t let Rayne down because I refuse to let myself down.
It’s about time for the sequel or would this be more of a trilogy or second trilogy?!
Either way it’s show time so blossoming roses don’t you worry because I refuse to let this rose wither away… I will be seeing you all soon… Just wait and I won’t disappoint…
Hello to all of my beautiful blossoming roses out there. I just want you to know that I have been okay. Okay I have been doing better than okay. I have been living my life with the love of my wife. It’s been awesome I guess. Rayne has been calling me up and asking if I would even consider returning back to IWF and to be honest I really don’t know. I will admit it was has been somewhat amusing to see Brittany take her big step into the company.
It’s what I always wanted for my daughter. I want to see her take the next step in her wrestling career. I want her to start doing things seriously instead of doing it for a cheap thrill. Wrestling shouldn’t be about wrestling from week to week with the only thing in mind is receiving a paycheck. She should take it seriously and it honestly hurts me to just see her wasting her life away from week to week without taking it seriously.
It has been hard from me. Whenever I stepped through those ropes it has always been the same thing. It has been a case of you aren’t worthy, you don’t belong here, you are garbage, and a waste of a roster space. Some people would be offended by everything and quickly find themselves in the performance center trying to better their craft. Yet what would that do for me?!
It wouldn’t do anything for me. I feel like I have been down that road and my biggest issue would be that of inconsistency. That is my poison of choice and it has been destroying me for the past seven years that this company has been in existence. I have had two chances at superstardom in this company and both times they ended far too quickly. I was a Ruby Champion but it was basically me co-starring with somebody else, and of course there comes the comments of how I have always been the supporting actress and never the star.
It has always been the case for as long as I could remember.
EMF… I was always going to Zelda’s shadows and it’s sickening that a long time ago in NCW I was actually engaged to Steve Awesome and then she… Well… I rather not talk about it.
There was the Best Friends Club that I created and I would have had no idea that the club would basically turn on me and everything I worked so hard to establish would be gone in a matter of minutes.
Why can’t I be the star in my own movie?!
Why can’t I have that break out performance?!
Yet I am only ever worthy of being a Razzie performing beauty at best.
I appreciate that Rayne and Ayla at least believe in me but it’s really hard when I don’ even belong in myself. I have never believed in myself and I guess that’s my biggest problem in all of this.
Yet you have a woman like Fiona who actually inspires me. She is a woman who has always been through so much yet she never quit. She had always kept on fighting and she had always stepped up. She walked away for a while and when she return she really became a legit threat. What she did at Spring Knockout was extraordinary it was actually impressive and I have so much respect for her.
A part of that wishes it was me.
I wish I had that type of strength.
It’s something I need to work on but you know what maybe there is more to this unfinished story!
Maybe I can make something of myself and I won’t let Rayne down because I refuse to let myself down.
It’s about time for the sequel or would this be more of a trilogy or second trilogy?!
Either way it’s show time so blossoming roses don’t you worry because I refuse to let this rose wither away… I will be seeing you all soon… Just wait and I won’t disappoint…
Well howdy there pardner.