Post by The Spencers on Mar 16, 2023 19:36:04 GMT
Stood under a giant IWF Performance Centre banner, left to right, from oldest to youngest are a band of brothers, often overlooked by company management - The Spencers. The oldest, Spencer stood next to coolest Bucky, who stood next to the most visually distinct, Jebediah and last but not least the smallest youngest and most geeky, Ricky.
Ricky surprisingly was the first to speak, brimming with a rarely seen confidence, which may or may not have everything to do with his girlfriend Birdie Winston recently having agreed to go public with their relationship.
Another year, another Roulette is almost upon us and though the official company line has always been that this is the one time of year that is a wide open field of play and that this is the one time of year that it can be anybody’s time of year ta really step up to the plate and shine, one need only take a few minutes ta look at the history of this match ta see the truth is actually quite different. The stark reality of the situation is that for each of the ten years that this match has been happening, only a handful of truly unestablished new stars have ever won the thing, and even fewer of that elite group actually managed to leave any kind of lastin’ legacy after they won the giant annual free for all…
Bucky was next to step forward, in his leather vest and shades, he spoke with a much more pronounced Southern accent and with decidedly less eloquence than his youngest brother.
Nah, see, before Ricky loses himself too much in the facts an’ figures of this match breakin’ it all down for ya’ll like the little lovable nerd he is, l ain’t here ta give all y’all a history lesson, except ta say that for half a decade now we’ve been caught up an’ lost in the Devo system. Forgotten almost, ‘an why? First it was ‘cause we ain’t fit the head honcho Spike’s idea of a formidable unit or maybe he just couldn’t come ta terms with supportin’ an’ nurturin’ a true blue brotherly bond….
Jebediah interjected, distinct from his brothers through virtue of being the most groomed, clearly he was somebody who took pride in his appearance and appeared at least on the surface to be the one who embraced the traditional masculine aesthetic the least.
Now that ain’t really all that surprisin’ is it? I mean the man spent two decades havin’ all kinds of relatives crawl out from under all sorts of rocks before he had the good graces just ta go kick the big one himself an’ rather than look out for any of them, all he ever wanted ta do was kick the shit out of them and if he couldn’t, well then ya got ignored altogether, least until he found himself desperate enough ta need a younger star’s relevancy ta leech off of an’ stave off obscurity a little bit longer. Of course, we can’t put all the piss poor management decisions on the shoulders of a dead man, can we? As fun as it is ta dunk on Spike Kane an’ Heaven knows some have made quite a lucrative career outta it, some of the accountability has ta fall on the livin’ embodiment of the old adage, “Those who can’t do, teach”, Bob Pooler…
The biggest and most well built of the brood, Spencer Spencer took up the baton to say his piece next, the steely look etched in his stone face foreshadowed a beast who spoke only for purpose and for maximum impact, an extension of his natural physical disposition and imposition.
More fool us for actually believin’ things would be different with The Queen City Saint shepherdin’ the next generation of supposed IWF superstars, but now I think we are far enough removed ta see just how full of shit an’ hot air the glorified twitch streamer who very occasionally moonlights as a pro wrestler really is. For years, we attended his classes where he fed us all the wild promises about how things would be different now and that we were all a family an’ all that Grade A premium horse shit…yet look around ya. In the year of our Lord 2023, which of proud Papa Pooler’s fabled kids have actually made it? How many originals from his class have ya ever seen get TV time or any kind of real opportunity at all?
Nah, see, we gave him every opportunity. We trusted the process an’ instead of takin’ advantage of the home grown talent right under their noses, the Powers That Be decided that they needed ta cast their net wider, promotin’ themselves on Twitter under a new open door policy ta come an’ be a big deal in the most major of all western promotions instead…an’ why? ‘Cause a few of the established boys with the most pull spoke the loudest an’ got their way. But here’s the bitter pill nobody wants ta take, this company’s problem has never been a social media one…
Bucky shook his head, removed his shades.
Naw, the real problem is an’ always has been a legacy hire problem…
Ricky surprisingly was the first to speak, brimming with a rarely seen confidence, which may or may not have everything to do with his girlfriend Birdie Winston recently having agreed to go public with their relationship.
Another year, another Roulette is almost upon us and though the official company line has always been that this is the one time of year that is a wide open field of play and that this is the one time of year that it can be anybody’s time of year ta really step up to the plate and shine, one need only take a few minutes ta look at the history of this match ta see the truth is actually quite different. The stark reality of the situation is that for each of the ten years that this match has been happening, only a handful of truly unestablished new stars have ever won the thing, and even fewer of that elite group actually managed to leave any kind of lastin’ legacy after they won the giant annual free for all…
Bucky was next to step forward, in his leather vest and shades, he spoke with a much more pronounced Southern accent and with decidedly less eloquence than his youngest brother.
Nah, see, before Ricky loses himself too much in the facts an’ figures of this match breakin’ it all down for ya’ll like the little lovable nerd he is, l ain’t here ta give all y’all a history lesson, except ta say that for half a decade now we’ve been caught up an’ lost in the Devo system. Forgotten almost, ‘an why? First it was ‘cause we ain’t fit the head honcho Spike’s idea of a formidable unit or maybe he just couldn’t come ta terms with supportin’ an’ nurturin’ a true blue brotherly bond….
Jebediah interjected, distinct from his brothers through virtue of being the most groomed, clearly he was somebody who took pride in his appearance and appeared at least on the surface to be the one who embraced the traditional masculine aesthetic the least.
Now that ain’t really all that surprisin’ is it? I mean the man spent two decades havin’ all kinds of relatives crawl out from under all sorts of rocks before he had the good graces just ta go kick the big one himself an’ rather than look out for any of them, all he ever wanted ta do was kick the shit out of them and if he couldn’t, well then ya got ignored altogether, least until he found himself desperate enough ta need a younger star’s relevancy ta leech off of an’ stave off obscurity a little bit longer. Of course, we can’t put all the piss poor management decisions on the shoulders of a dead man, can we? As fun as it is ta dunk on Spike Kane an’ Heaven knows some have made quite a lucrative career outta it, some of the accountability has ta fall on the livin’ embodiment of the old adage, “Those who can’t do, teach”, Bob Pooler…
The biggest and most well built of the brood, Spencer Spencer took up the baton to say his piece next, the steely look etched in his stone face foreshadowed a beast who spoke only for purpose and for maximum impact, an extension of his natural physical disposition and imposition.
More fool us for actually believin’ things would be different with The Queen City Saint shepherdin’ the next generation of supposed IWF superstars, but now I think we are far enough removed ta see just how full of shit an’ hot air the glorified twitch streamer who very occasionally moonlights as a pro wrestler really is. For years, we attended his classes where he fed us all the wild promises about how things would be different now and that we were all a family an’ all that Grade A premium horse shit…yet look around ya. In the year of our Lord 2023, which of proud Papa Pooler’s fabled kids have actually made it? How many originals from his class have ya ever seen get TV time or any kind of real opportunity at all?
Nah, see, we gave him every opportunity. We trusted the process an’ instead of takin’ advantage of the home grown talent right under their noses, the Powers That Be decided that they needed ta cast their net wider, promotin’ themselves on Twitter under a new open door policy ta come an’ be a big deal in the most major of all western promotions instead…an’ why? ‘Cause a few of the established boys with the most pull spoke the loudest an’ got their way. But here’s the bitter pill nobody wants ta take, this company’s problem has never been a social media one…
Bucky shook his head, removed his shades.
Naw, the real problem is an’ always has been a legacy hire problem…