Post by Pax Stormcrow on Mar 19, 2024 5:15:00 GMT
Pax sat in the chair in the impromptu makeup room setup in a building next to the art house theater where the premiere was taking place. A cosmetologist patted powder on his face, to take the shine off of his skin and to keep any sweat from showing up. The lights on the red carpet were bright and the flashbulbs would be intense. The artist talked in a continuous stream about jaw lines and contours and bone structure. He had let them touch him up a bit, but in general was always pretty happy with how he looked. So nothing too extreme.
He shifted slightly in the uncomfortable chair as he stared at himself in the mirror. He didn’t have a lot of hair for them to mess with. A fact he still regretted. Growing up his hair was long. But when he started working with the olympic team there were questions of presentation, of propriety. Hell his coaches even told him there were issues with offering hand holds to the opponent. But he still regretted it. He still remembered the tears he forced back staring at the barbershop floor as they sweeped it up.
But it was his look now. To change it almost felt like a worst betrayal then cutting it off. Not that he could make any sense of that. He frowned slightly to himself, curious about the unbidden thought. It was probably the conversation at lunch. What did it mean to be Indigenous in the national spotlight after all? How should you present? What if you are too bland? What if you are too NDN? A thousand and one potential judgements.
He shook his head. He was who he was. He was not a character. He portrayed himself exactly how he wanted to be portrayed. Any claims that it wasn’t indigenous or too indigenous could happily fuck off. He was who he was. Everyone else can choke on it.
He let out an audible breath as the cosmetologist started to spray water on his hair, preparing it for whatever style they had in mind for him. Though that caused other thoughts to invade his mind after dealing with his image issues. Of long raven hair being tucked behind an ear. Of pretty smiles and laughs, though sardonic, that made his heart beat faster.
It was almost a relief when his phone started to ring. He started to reach for it when the person working his hair gave him a sharp tug and pointed to the earpiece on the table in front of him. He hated using them, but it was the better choice in the current position. He plucked it off the table and settled it in his ear before pushing the button to answer the call. Though a hiss escaped him as his movements earned another tug on his hair.
“This is Pax.”
“Mr. Stormcrow! It is so good to hear from you again. I hope your preparation is going well.”
He suppressed the sigh, and the shudder that threatened to run through him. His work with Prairie Fiber had taken a turn after his defeat at the hands of Dean and he felt the bounds of that leash tighten every day.
“Ya, Mr. Morris. I’m in hair and make up right now. Don’t worry sir, I am on schedule for my appearance.”
“Excellent. Wonderful. I understand you were a touch late to your previous engagement.”
“Ya, well the ‘assistant’ you sent me insisted on micro-managing every aspect of my day. I’d have been on time if I didn’t have to jump through the hoops they put in place.”
The assistant had barged into his hotel room while he was in the shower and started going on about schedules and attitude. He barely kept himself together with the invasion of a stranger in his room.
“Yes. I understand you dismissed them. That is not part of your contract, Mr. Stormcrow.”
“Ya well maybe give me a call first instead of having someone burst in on me naked telling me shit I already know. I can handle this public appearance stuff. I’m willing to put up with a lot but give me some fucking space, Morris.”
The silence on the other end extended for a long time.
“You will speak to me respectfully, Mr. Stormcrow.”
There was a sense of menace to the tone of voice and this time Pax couldn’t help but shiver.
“Sorry sir. She burst in on me in the shower. It put me off. I apologize. Plus she started lecturing me on my breakfast and our arrangement was that my nutrition plan was approved and out of your purview.”
“Well then! Yes, that is unacceptable.”
The threat is now gone from the other man’s tone of voice. All sweet honey words once more. Which in truth was almost more disturbing.
“I apologize for that breach of etiquette. I will arrange for someone else to handle the issues while you are on your tour for the film release. It will not happen again.”
“Uh, thanks. Sir. I do appreciate that.”
“Just as I am sure that you will be more respectful to our arrangement.”
“Yes. Uh, Mr. Morris. I will.”
“Excellent. I am happy to hear it. I also heard that you were missing after your signing arrangement. I trust everything was well?”
“Just some personal time, sir. Getting some food before the event so I could be up to putting a good face forward.”
“Nothing at all to do with our neighbor at the event, I am sure.”
He felt the heat in his cheeks. He also felt a stab of anger in his chest. He quickly dismissed both sensations.
“A chance at networking, sir. Just helping a new talent out. Maybe even a potential recruit.”
“Wonderful. Keep up the good work Mr. Stormcrow.”
The call ended abruptly, as they usually did. He settled back in the chair, trying to ignore the acrid taste in his mouth. Free of the phone call and with only the cosmetologist with him he allowed himself another shudder.
_________________________________
The vlog opens up and one can tell immediately from the tastefully bland decor in the background the Pax is broadcasting from a hotel room. The man himself is sitting at a desk wearing a Bourbon Street Saints t-shirt that has been heavily altered into a tank top. He beams that winning smile of his at the camera.
“What up Neechie’s, it’s ya boi! Coming to you on the circuit for my new movie that’s out now. You ain’t gonna see me in it, but if ya look closely you’ll be able to see the work that I put into it. Check it out, it’s a good flick about the life of The Crusher. Alright, shameless plug outta the way. Let’s get on to business.”
He grins and lets out an easy laugh.
“I tell ya working the movie biz is a whole different animal then working in wrestling. I’ve missed the hell out of the fights, the competition. I’ve missed you all as well. So you can bet that I am looking forward to getting back into that ring and performing for all of you. Not to mention reminding everyone just who the fuck I am.”
His smile falters a bit and he exhales a breath. He drums his hands on the desk for a moment before running them through his hair.
“We done already talked about my struggles. I owed up to my failings. So we ain’t gonna rehash that here. This is about positivity. This is about confidence. So, why do I think I can go into the Roulette and win it all?”
He leans back in his chair and stairs at the camera for a moment before his lips curl into a cocky little smirk.
“Because there isn’t anything your boi likes more than shoving people’s words down their throat. No one said I would win Heir to the Throne. Not only did I win it, but I went undefeated. I faced off against Angel and his nepo babies week after week and I put every single one of their shoulders to the mat. I turned up against the best this company has and I came out on top. So no one should be acting like I can’t beat them on any given day. There ain’t a champion in this company right now that I didn’t beat except for Jennie and I just ain’t got the opportunity to do so yet. I have the skill, the natural ability and the will to walk in there and suplex every single other person in that match out of the ring and stand tall at the end of it. I can do it and everyone in back knows that I can.”
He takes another deep breath and rests his chin against his chest.
“Because that’s what I do. Do I choke? Do I run off sometimes when I get to up in my head to help myself? I do. Did a whole vlog about it and how I’m trying to work through it. But here’s the thing?”
He lifts his head and smirks at the camera.
“Gotta be good to choke. You gotta make that ascent to fall off the mountain. You gotta take the shot to miss it. Sure, some could say that I’ve used up all my good luck. That the boss is over me. That I’m not going to get the chances I once had. And you might be right. But I’m working my perceptions. I’m not just training my body anymore. I’m training my mind and I’m training my heart. If I don’t get the chances? Then I’m going to make my own. If Verona is over me then I’ll just make him pay attention again. Y'all are stuck with me. I got the drive and the passion. I mean to take hold of the reins of my life for once and ride that bitch into the ground.”
He uncrosses his arms and rests his hands on the desk. His body slowly relaxes from the state he had worked himself into and he leans forward, the bright smile on his face again.
“You might not believe me. Hell I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t. That’s alright. I’ll make you believe. I’ll grab you by the hair and make you pay attention to me. Maybe not this month. The Roulette is a madhouse and it’s a fool's errand to buck the tiger. But that doesn’t change that I am going to rip off those curtains, walk down that ramp and make you look. I will be champion again. Because I want to be. Not for a legacy or for my mom or for my people. Not even for all of you. I love you all, don’t get me wrong. But I need to do it because I want it. I’m following my own advice and doing what I want to do. What feels right for me. And that’s why this time is different. You don’t gotta believe now. I’ll make you.”
He stretches his arms above his head, grinning brightly.
“All eyes on me. We gonna jump on that Tiger and see where it takes us. Skoden.”
He relaxes after a satisfying crack, flashing his two fingers at the camera.
“Peace out.”
He slams the laptop shut, cutting the feed.
He shifted slightly in the uncomfortable chair as he stared at himself in the mirror. He didn’t have a lot of hair for them to mess with. A fact he still regretted. Growing up his hair was long. But when he started working with the olympic team there were questions of presentation, of propriety. Hell his coaches even told him there were issues with offering hand holds to the opponent. But he still regretted it. He still remembered the tears he forced back staring at the barbershop floor as they sweeped it up.
But it was his look now. To change it almost felt like a worst betrayal then cutting it off. Not that he could make any sense of that. He frowned slightly to himself, curious about the unbidden thought. It was probably the conversation at lunch. What did it mean to be Indigenous in the national spotlight after all? How should you present? What if you are too bland? What if you are too NDN? A thousand and one potential judgements.
He shook his head. He was who he was. He was not a character. He portrayed himself exactly how he wanted to be portrayed. Any claims that it wasn’t indigenous or too indigenous could happily fuck off. He was who he was. Everyone else can choke on it.
He let out an audible breath as the cosmetologist started to spray water on his hair, preparing it for whatever style they had in mind for him. Though that caused other thoughts to invade his mind after dealing with his image issues. Of long raven hair being tucked behind an ear. Of pretty smiles and laughs, though sardonic, that made his heart beat faster.
It was almost a relief when his phone started to ring. He started to reach for it when the person working his hair gave him a sharp tug and pointed to the earpiece on the table in front of him. He hated using them, but it was the better choice in the current position. He plucked it off the table and settled it in his ear before pushing the button to answer the call. Though a hiss escaped him as his movements earned another tug on his hair.
“This is Pax.”
“Mr. Stormcrow! It is so good to hear from you again. I hope your preparation is going well.”
He suppressed the sigh, and the shudder that threatened to run through him. His work with Prairie Fiber had taken a turn after his defeat at the hands of Dean and he felt the bounds of that leash tighten every day.
“Ya, Mr. Morris. I’m in hair and make up right now. Don’t worry sir, I am on schedule for my appearance.”
“Excellent. Wonderful. I understand you were a touch late to your previous engagement.”
“Ya, well the ‘assistant’ you sent me insisted on micro-managing every aspect of my day. I’d have been on time if I didn’t have to jump through the hoops they put in place.”
The assistant had barged into his hotel room while he was in the shower and started going on about schedules and attitude. He barely kept himself together with the invasion of a stranger in his room.
“Yes. I understand you dismissed them. That is not part of your contract, Mr. Stormcrow.”
“Ya well maybe give me a call first instead of having someone burst in on me naked telling me shit I already know. I can handle this public appearance stuff. I’m willing to put up with a lot but give me some fucking space, Morris.”
The silence on the other end extended for a long time.
“You will speak to me respectfully, Mr. Stormcrow.”
There was a sense of menace to the tone of voice and this time Pax couldn’t help but shiver.
“Sorry sir. She burst in on me in the shower. It put me off. I apologize. Plus she started lecturing me on my breakfast and our arrangement was that my nutrition plan was approved and out of your purview.”
“Well then! Yes, that is unacceptable.”
The threat is now gone from the other man’s tone of voice. All sweet honey words once more. Which in truth was almost more disturbing.
“I apologize for that breach of etiquette. I will arrange for someone else to handle the issues while you are on your tour for the film release. It will not happen again.”
“Uh, thanks. Sir. I do appreciate that.”
“Just as I am sure that you will be more respectful to our arrangement.”
“Yes. Uh, Mr. Morris. I will.”
“Excellent. I am happy to hear it. I also heard that you were missing after your signing arrangement. I trust everything was well?”
“Just some personal time, sir. Getting some food before the event so I could be up to putting a good face forward.”
“Nothing at all to do with our neighbor at the event, I am sure.”
He felt the heat in his cheeks. He also felt a stab of anger in his chest. He quickly dismissed both sensations.
“A chance at networking, sir. Just helping a new talent out. Maybe even a potential recruit.”
“Wonderful. Keep up the good work Mr. Stormcrow.”
The call ended abruptly, as they usually did. He settled back in the chair, trying to ignore the acrid taste in his mouth. Free of the phone call and with only the cosmetologist with him he allowed himself another shudder.
_________________________________
The vlog opens up and one can tell immediately from the tastefully bland decor in the background the Pax is broadcasting from a hotel room. The man himself is sitting at a desk wearing a Bourbon Street Saints t-shirt that has been heavily altered into a tank top. He beams that winning smile of his at the camera.
“What up Neechie’s, it’s ya boi! Coming to you on the circuit for my new movie that’s out now. You ain’t gonna see me in it, but if ya look closely you’ll be able to see the work that I put into it. Check it out, it’s a good flick about the life of The Crusher. Alright, shameless plug outta the way. Let’s get on to business.”
He grins and lets out an easy laugh.
“I tell ya working the movie biz is a whole different animal then working in wrestling. I’ve missed the hell out of the fights, the competition. I’ve missed you all as well. So you can bet that I am looking forward to getting back into that ring and performing for all of you. Not to mention reminding everyone just who the fuck I am.”
His smile falters a bit and he exhales a breath. He drums his hands on the desk for a moment before running them through his hair.
“We done already talked about my struggles. I owed up to my failings. So we ain’t gonna rehash that here. This is about positivity. This is about confidence. So, why do I think I can go into the Roulette and win it all?”
He leans back in his chair and stairs at the camera for a moment before his lips curl into a cocky little smirk.
“Because there isn’t anything your boi likes more than shoving people’s words down their throat. No one said I would win Heir to the Throne. Not only did I win it, but I went undefeated. I faced off against Angel and his nepo babies week after week and I put every single one of their shoulders to the mat. I turned up against the best this company has and I came out on top. So no one should be acting like I can’t beat them on any given day. There ain’t a champion in this company right now that I didn’t beat except for Jennie and I just ain’t got the opportunity to do so yet. I have the skill, the natural ability and the will to walk in there and suplex every single other person in that match out of the ring and stand tall at the end of it. I can do it and everyone in back knows that I can.”
He takes another deep breath and rests his chin against his chest.
“Because that’s what I do. Do I choke? Do I run off sometimes when I get to up in my head to help myself? I do. Did a whole vlog about it and how I’m trying to work through it. But here’s the thing?”
He lifts his head and smirks at the camera.
“Gotta be good to choke. You gotta make that ascent to fall off the mountain. You gotta take the shot to miss it. Sure, some could say that I’ve used up all my good luck. That the boss is over me. That I’m not going to get the chances I once had. And you might be right. But I’m working my perceptions. I’m not just training my body anymore. I’m training my mind and I’m training my heart. If I don’t get the chances? Then I’m going to make my own. If Verona is over me then I’ll just make him pay attention again. Y'all are stuck with me. I got the drive and the passion. I mean to take hold of the reins of my life for once and ride that bitch into the ground.”
He uncrosses his arms and rests his hands on the desk. His body slowly relaxes from the state he had worked himself into and he leans forward, the bright smile on his face again.
“You might not believe me. Hell I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t. That’s alright. I’ll make you believe. I’ll grab you by the hair and make you pay attention to me. Maybe not this month. The Roulette is a madhouse and it’s a fool's errand to buck the tiger. But that doesn’t change that I am going to rip off those curtains, walk down that ramp and make you look. I will be champion again. Because I want to be. Not for a legacy or for my mom or for my people. Not even for all of you. I love you all, don’t get me wrong. But I need to do it because I want it. I’m following my own advice and doing what I want to do. What feels right for me. And that’s why this time is different. You don’t gotta believe now. I’ll make you.”
He stretches his arms above his head, grinning brightly.
“All eyes on me. We gonna jump on that Tiger and see where it takes us. Skoden.”
He relaxes after a satisfying crack, flashing his two fingers at the camera.
“Peace out.”
He slams the laptop shut, cutting the feed.
Well howdy there pardner.