Spike TV: Episode 3 - Mike Machado

[Ghost Spike]

Spike TV: Episode 3
Featuring Mike Machado

Cruiserweights, take a bow. You guys put on one hell of a show, and set the bar for all highlight house shows that follow, as well as winning last weeks poll, kudos boys. There’s been some intense action, and it seems most notably between my brother, and the fakest faker who ever faked....Alex Jones. Oh, don’t worry Alex, I’ll give you your moment to shine on this show that you feel I have just to shine light up my own ass. How’s it going dude? I see you’re still spilling your bile and bullshhhhhh*t, I mean.....company man? That’s why you were in every federation going? I mean some you even latched onto me to try and steal my limelight. I just find it hilarious that you spit this crap, and even more so that people buy it. You’re a brown nosing piece of crap Alex, an attention seeking whisperer who never deserved to hold the nCw World Title. I’m glad you got screwed......makes up for all the times you screwed others over.

That aside of course, IWF is certainly beginning to take shape now, the divisions are becoming firmly set, and superstars are beginning to make names for themselves, or be put to shame, like Mr Laszlo....two losses on the bounce bro, suck it.

But this week we shine the light on the Diamonds division, and I refuse to make some witty Rhianna comment.....dammit. Women gracing our screen, and tournamanets abound.....IWF is certainly starting to heat up as we approach Bloody Assizes.

Also ladies and gents we have the first Straight Shootin’ with Mike Machado, and trust me.....you’re in for a surprise (unless you work with him of course then you will know what he’s like outside the ring)

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ALL HAIL!

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This weeks superstars who deserve their moment in the spotlight!

Jake Keeton - I seemingly cannot take this guy of the list here, he’s knocking it out of the park week after week and it’s quite clear that he’s lining himself up to be quite the playmaker around here. This week I have the task of trying to break his streak, along with protecting my own, and of course not letting the stereotypical aussie sneak a win No bones to pick, great work Jake you deserve to be here.

Alex Jones -As much as I hate him Alex has done exactly what he’s damn good at doing, and has people talking about him. In this business any publicity is good publicity, and as well as picking up a great main event victory on the Cruiserweight show, he’s been popping up all over the place, and as much as it pains me, he deserves to be here this week.

Ryleigh Knite/Emma Danielson/Ayla St. James/Eternity- Heiress to the Throne qualifiers. These three women delivered when they needed to and they’ve progressed one step closer to etching their name into the history books of IWF once and for all. It’ll be interesting to see how this develops.

Caleb Lockwood- Lockwood certainly made a name for himself by pulling out a HUGE victory in the Assault X match, not only helping put IWF’s Cruiserweights on the map, but putting his own name firmly in the hunt for a title shot.

InFamous - Come on, undefeated. We rule, and you know it. Suck it, Laszlo.

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SHOW HIGHLIGHTS

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HIGH POINTS

- A great house show from the Cruiserweights Division

- An uninterrupted Main Event on Sacrifice

- InFamous reigning supreme

- Heiress to the Throne Qualifiers

- Assault X Match, I love gimmick matches.

- The announcement of the World Heavyweight Championship Scramble

- Alex Jones vs Brad Kane being booked

- Beating Mike Laszlo

- Ryan Blade pulling off a huge victory

- Jake Keeton proving me right


LOW POINTS

-Alex Jones trying to make everything about him, again.....for crying out loud die already. - Oh look, this one gets to carry on from last week.

-Having to wait till Bloody Assizes for Brad vs Alex

-Bernard de Montfort showing up to hog the limelight again

-Xander Famularo thrusting himself into the limelight again, we get it dude....you’re tough.

-Gjenrei picking up a less than honorable victory.

-Myself being left out of all the tournaments and fun......I know I’m amazing and I scare you’re talent, but I thought this was a “fresh” start? Pfft whatever, Rob and I will lay claim to our own gold soon enough.

-Really wasn’t many low points, the previous is just me griping, the shows were very good, keep it up guys.

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PREDICTIONS

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Last Week: 8 - 5
Overall: 11 - 9

So I managed to swing it in the favour of right over wrong this week, not by much but enough to feel good about. I’d have had more if the people I had faith in actually stood up and did their jobs, and if Alex Jones wasn’t a giant douchebag, but.....oh well.

IWF DIAMOND'S HOUSE SHOW

SINGLES MATCH
Deathtrain vs Mike Machado
PREDICTION: I have to go with this weeks guest, he’s just got that factor - Mike Machado

SINGLES MATCH
Angel Black vs Ryleigh Knite
PREDICTION: Every week I pick Ryleigh, and I’m afraid I’m going to have to stick with it, she hasn’t given me a reason not to.

SINGLES MATCH
Freakke vs Brad Kane
PREDICTION: I hate Clowns. I love my brother, simple. Brad.

FOUR WAY MATCH
Alysson Gardner vs Ayla St James vs Emma Danielson vs Kate Steele
PREDICTION: Last time I didn’t pick my wife, and I paid the price, so....Alysson!

MAIN EVENT
SINGLES MATCH
Tara Fenix vs Portia Roberts
PREDICTION: I hate both these women.....Tara....just cause I slept with her.

IWF SACRIFICE

TRIPLE THREAT MATCH
Spike Kane vs Jake Keeton vs Stephen Kingsley
PREDICTION: I’m going to give it my all, but I’m thinking Keeton may steal this one.

CRUISER WEIGHT SHOWCASE MATCH
Ryan Shane vs Alex Jones vs Bushido vs John Rherring vs Cable Arcane vs Gjenrei
PREDICTION: You know what, as much as I hated the Internationals, I’m going with Bushido, he’s been on a roll.

DIAMONDS HEIRESS TO THE THRONE QUALIFICATION MATCH
Isabella Maldini vs Jessica Reed
PREDICTION: Intrigue abound....hmmm....I’m going with Reed.

SINGLES MATCH
Xander Famularo vs Blake Collins
PREDICTION: Interesting match up, Xander has a statement to make, so he’ll pick up the win.

DIAMONDS HEIRESS TO THE THRONE QUALIFICATION MATCH
Tifa Heafy vs Ashley Mastrangelo
PREDICTION: Tifa was trained by a Kane, she’s got this.

DIAMONDS HEIRESS TO THE THRONE QUALIFICATION MATCH
Special Guest Referee by order of Katherine Lockheart: The Ace
Kathleen Conway vs Louise McDowell
PREDICTION: Well, if the odds aren’t stacked.....heh....stacked....Kathy.

MAN OF STEEL CHAMPIONSHIP CHASE
SUBMISSION ONLY
Daniel Constantine vs Ryan Blade vs Joe Everyman
PREDICTION: I picked Danny last week and got let down, so I’m going with my old friend, Joe Everyman

TAG TEAM MATCH
The Naturals vs The James Gang
PREDICTION: Snore fest! Ugh......the Naturals, I hate rednecks.

HEAVYWEIGHT TAG TEAM SHOWCASE
Andrew Jacobsen and Seth Evans vs Xavier Cross and Mike Laszlo
PREDICTIONS: Who would have thought ANY of these guys would be your first world champion? Well.....I’d accept two, maybe...and they’re on opposite teams....I’m going for Cross and Laszlo, Mikey needs that win really bad.

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STRAIGHT SHOOTIN’

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Welcome ladies and gentlemen to our first edition of IWF’s Straight Shootin’ with Spike Kane, where we take an outside of the ring look at some of your favourite superstars, tonights guest, is the Mediocre one! Mike Machado!

Q. So Mike, how did you get into the wrestling game?

Well, my dear Spike that is a tale for the ages. I was in a very large Broadway production, playing the role of Tobias Ragg in a splendid version of Sweeney Todd when I was approached by a rather large man in a rather large hat. He promised me a much bigger stage on which to perform, not to mention monetary compensation that Broadway could never offer. I could not let such a tempting opportunity slip through my hands; and the rest, they say – is history.

Q. And what would you define as you're "big break"?

Well, I do recall beating a certain “God of extreme” in the Global Wrestling Coalition. *chuckles* I know you were pre-occupied during that match, but honestly, I knew at that point that I had made the correct career decision. I was beginning to get the exposure that deep down, we as entertainers all crave.

Q. I remember coming up against you in GWC, and having quite a blast with those promo's you cut, do you find it hard to add comedy yet still be taken seriously as a competitor?

I work very hard to try to maintain a balance between the two. My main objective, first and foremost is to entertain the fans. As long as they’re smiling, I know I’m doing my job. As far as the balance is concerned, that is ‘to be continued’. I think it can, and will change a bit throughout the years.

Q. Do you have any particular goals here in IWF?

Thus far in my wrestling career I’ve been to many places, and accomplished many things, but I’ve yet to capture a major title. I hope to rectify that in the IWF. I also have a personal goal to stick around until the end. My off-camera demons definitely got the best of me in nCw, and to a lesser degree in the GWC. This time I want to be more dependable, and really give the fans a chance to get to know and love Mike Machado. Apart from that, I want to be known as a brilliant performer, an entertainer that is adored by fans and respected by peers. You know, the normal wrestler aspirations.

Q. Anybody in particular that you would like to work with?

It’s no secret that I’m a huge fan of your brother, Brad Kane. I’d love to have a program with him during one of his more ‘vicious’ streaks. There are few men that are as easy to hate as Brad, and he’s truly a genius in the ring.

Q. How do you get such a perfect mustache?

Ah yes, the mustache. There are men and women in the back that don’t get enough credit for grooming it. I like to consider it more of a piece of facial art, than just a mustache. I suppose it helps that I perpetually have the testosterone of an 18 year old man flowing through my veins. The doctor calls it a rare disease, I call it a gift from the gods.

Q. Do women love the 'stache?

It’s recently fallen out of societies current trend to have a mustache; however throughout the ages it’s been a sign of virility – and there’s still something to that. A gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell, but let’s just say I do fine for myself in my extracurricular activities.

Q. Do dudes love the mustache?

I just said - a gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell.

Q. Does the mustache help your ability in the ring?

The mustache plays a very important role in the story that I tell. It is an invaluable tool; it is my signature, my nod to Chaplin, and how I will be remembered in the annals of history. My piece de resistance, if you will. There is no Machado without the mustache, and there is no mustache without Machado.

Q. Do you have any interesting mustache stories?

Probably too many for one interview. There is one that stands out more than the others, however. An overzealous fan, determined to out me as a fraud ran up to me and attempted to rip the mustache off of my face. Unbeknownst to him, the mustache is very real, and waxed carefully and frequently. He simply slipped off of my mustache, and into the path of a moving car. A tragic tale, to be sure.

Q. How would you rate your time in this business? (A. B. C etc)

Overall, probably a C, with flashes of B-quality material. I am probably my own biggest critic.

WORD ASSOCIATION.
Just say the first thing that pops into your head.

Simon De Montfort

Mastermind

Mediocre

A fitting moniker for Mike Machado thus far

Jake Keeton

Wrestler

Trent Helms

All-time great entertainer

Seth Evans

juvenile

Freakke the Clown

Earnest and sincere entertainer

Mike Honcho

Great friend, 2nd greatest mustache of all-time

IWF

New beginnings with built-in epic history

and of course, Spike Kane.

Living legend in this business

Well, thank you for that Mike, and for joining me on the first "Straight Shootin'" Mike, as always it's a pleasure to work with you and I wish you luck in your future here in IWF.

Same to you, Spike. Thank you for the opportunity.

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FINAL THOUGHTS

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So the pay per view is next week, the names and hats are all being sorted. We know that one of four men will be our first world heavyweight champion, and we will know who will be in with a chance of being the first cruiserweight champion. Bloody Assizes is going to be one hell of a show, and barely any matches have been confirmed. What we do know is...

Heir to the Throne

Heiress to the Throne.

World Champion.

Cruiserweight Champion.

and of course, Man of Steel Champion.

But remember guys, in IWF anything can happen, and who knows where we will be this time next week? Tune in to the Diamonds Showcase and Monday Night Sacrifice! This is your host, Spike Kane, signing off.

Adios.