Post by Mike Machado on Jun 22, 2013 0:46:06 GMT
Gib walks up to the front door of Mike Machado’s humble abode, stepping over an old rusty Weber grill on his way to knocking on the door.
“Goddamn slob.”
Gib knocks three times on the door, loudly.
“…One minute!”
Machado’s muffled voice barely makes it through the crack of the door. Gib sighs and throws his hands up, talking to himself in frustration.
“I come to say goodbye and he can’t be assed to answer the door in a timely manner.”
Gib raps on the door again, a little harder this time.
“MACHADO! C’MON MAN I GOTTA GET BACK TO THE SCHOOL.”
Crashing sounds are heard on the other side of the door, and moments later the door opens up and sticks out above the waist, leaning out of the door.
“Oh, hey Gib. Thanks for everything. Catch ya later.”
Machado attempts to shut the door, but Gib quickly wedges his foot in the bottom, preventing the door from closing completely.
“That’s just disrespectful, Machado. You could at least thank me properly. Afterall, you managed to take fourth place in the battle royal – you’ve placed yourself in a decent position to make an improbable run at the Imperial championship….”
“Yeah… thanks, Gib… it’s just… I’m kinda busy…”
Gib smiles.
“Machado, do you have a girl in the house right now?”
“I… what? No… it’s nothing like that…”
“You sly dog you! Let’s see her, then!”
Machado tries to hold the door closed, but Gib easily overpowers him, ripping the door open and stepping into the house.
“What in the actual fu-“
“Gib, I…”
For starters, Machado is wearing a pair of old sweatpants, with a huge bulge in the crotch area with what appears to be either an erection, or an abnormal amount of pubic hair in the shape of an erection. ..I’m not ruling either one out at this point.
“I’m…preparing…”
The glow of a distant computer monitor bathes Machado and Gib in low light, but Gib’s shocked and appalled facial expression is enough to know that there is something that is just not right here.
“Preparing for what, Machado? Is that a goddamn horse and a woman?”
Machado quickly rushes past Gib, slightly brushing him with his pubic hairection. Gib’s so stunned he doesn’t even notice.
“Well, it’s not really… I mean… it’s photoshopped.”
“So… why is there a photoshopped picture of Amber Richards having sex with a horse?”
Machado finally makes it to the computer and moves the mouse quickly, a couple clicks later and Gib’s face drops any further toward the ground.
“Is that Kate Steele dressed as a giant bunny rabbit? Machado… what the hell?”
Machado curses loudly and finally hits the power button on the monitor, turning it all the way off.
“Gib, I’m trying to ..ahem… prepare… for judging the lingerie contest.”
“And soo….?”
“Well, I’m trying to desensitize myself as much as possible so that I won’t embarrass myself on Sacrifice…”
Gib shakes his head.
“Well Machado, I’ve taught you all that I can. I honestly wish the best for you, but you’re one strange dude.”
Gib walks out, shaking his head some more.
“Thank you, Gib…”
The door shuts as Gib leaves. Machado sits back down and turns the computer monitor back on.
“Alright… so now for the Ashley Mastrangelo hentai…”
“Goddamn slob.”
Gib knocks three times on the door, loudly.
“…One minute!”
Machado’s muffled voice barely makes it through the crack of the door. Gib sighs and throws his hands up, talking to himself in frustration.
“I come to say goodbye and he can’t be assed to answer the door in a timely manner.”
Gib raps on the door again, a little harder this time.
“MACHADO! C’MON MAN I GOTTA GET BACK TO THE SCHOOL.”
Crashing sounds are heard on the other side of the door, and moments later the door opens up and sticks out above the waist, leaning out of the door.
“Oh, hey Gib. Thanks for everything. Catch ya later.”
Machado attempts to shut the door, but Gib quickly wedges his foot in the bottom, preventing the door from closing completely.
“That’s just disrespectful, Machado. You could at least thank me properly. Afterall, you managed to take fourth place in the battle royal – you’ve placed yourself in a decent position to make an improbable run at the Imperial championship….”
“Yeah… thanks, Gib… it’s just… I’m kinda busy…”
Gib smiles.
“Machado, do you have a girl in the house right now?”
“I… what? No… it’s nothing like that…”
“You sly dog you! Let’s see her, then!”
Machado tries to hold the door closed, but Gib easily overpowers him, ripping the door open and stepping into the house.
“What in the actual fu-“
“Gib, I…”
For starters, Machado is wearing a pair of old sweatpants, with a huge bulge in the crotch area with what appears to be either an erection, or an abnormal amount of pubic hair in the shape of an erection. ..I’m not ruling either one out at this point.
“I’m…preparing…”
The glow of a distant computer monitor bathes Machado and Gib in low light, but Gib’s shocked and appalled facial expression is enough to know that there is something that is just not right here.
“Preparing for what, Machado? Is that a goddamn horse and a woman?”
Machado quickly rushes past Gib, slightly brushing him with his pubic hairection. Gib’s so stunned he doesn’t even notice.
“Well, it’s not really… I mean… it’s photoshopped.”
“So… why is there a photoshopped picture of Amber Richards having sex with a horse?”
Machado finally makes it to the computer and moves the mouse quickly, a couple clicks later and Gib’s face drops any further toward the ground.
“Is that Kate Steele dressed as a giant bunny rabbit? Machado… what the hell?”
Machado curses loudly and finally hits the power button on the monitor, turning it all the way off.
“Gib, I’m trying to ..ahem… prepare… for judging the lingerie contest.”
“And soo….?”
“Well, I’m trying to desensitize myself as much as possible so that I won’t embarrass myself on Sacrifice…”
Gib shakes his head.
“Well Machado, I’ve taught you all that I can. I honestly wish the best for you, but you’re one strange dude.”
Gib walks out, shaking his head some more.
“Thank you, Gib…”
The door shuts as Gib leaves. Machado sits back down and turns the computer monitor back on.
“Alright… so now for the Ashley Mastrangelo hentai…”
Well howdy there pardner.