Post by Cable Arcane on May 10, 2017 2:39:50 GMT
Chapter Three
Most people don’t know this about me but I’ve suffered from depression and anxiety for my entire life.
It’s not exactly something you bring up in a Q and A session or in the middle of an in ring promo but it’s something I’ve had to struggle with. It’s cost me both personal and professional relationships, jobs, lovers, friends and family. What made it worse was I struggled undiagnosed for the majority of my life until one particularly hard break up forced me to take a long hard look at myself and see what I could do to fix me.
I was prescribed a lovely little white pill by the name of Citalopram, 40 milligrams a day, everyday and eventually I was able to function in society without wanting to knock out every last person I crossed paths with.
But as I found myself now aimlessly pacing in that holding cell in New Orleans, Louisiana, I could feel the anxiety returning. And let me explain something for a moment, anxiety isn’t just your heart racing or your breath coming in shallow fast bursts. It’s your mind racing from thought to thought to thought, thinking of every possible thing that could go wrong and how all of it was your fault.
As I waited for my phone I thought about trying to escape like my life would suddenly become an episode of Prison Break but that line of thinking ended in a car chase then car crash. Then I switched to just admitting fault, hell, I remembered possibly hitting someone, didn’t I? Maybe if I just played along I’d get out of prison still young enough for a come back tour. Then again my mind raced to another thought, there are bars on the windows, they had only taken my shoe laces but my shirt seemed to be made of strong material, I could probably tie a pretty tight knot-
I stopped myself; I took a long, deep breath and tried to relax. These were the sort of thoughts that once lead me to contemplating suicide the last time my life seemed to fall apart. I couldn’t afford to be that much of a mess right now. I needed to not just compose myself but control my thoughts. I knew then as I know now that I didn’t do anything wrong, I wasn’t guilty of the crime they were accusing me of and I needed to fight this, not give in to my anxiety.
“Mr. Arcane?” Detective Picard turned back up at the door of the cell with my cell phone held out in his out stretched hand, “Your phone?”
I hesitated then quickly took it from him mumbling “Thank you,” as I turned the phone on.
I could feel him still lingering at the door as I waited for the phone to power up, almost immediately it hit me with the dreaded “10% Battery Power” alert and I could feel my earlier panic returning.
I scrolled through my contacts as quickly as I could trying to figure who I could call, obviously everyone I had associated with in the House of Howlett was out, they never helped me before and they weren’t about to start now. My thumb lingered over the names of Jones and Valentine before I quickly moved on to another, a name I hadn’t said out loud in years, Gjenrei…
At one point we were like brothers but now? I don’t know. I don’t know if anyone ever truly gets over the sort of things we did to each other, but that’s a story for another day.
I continued scrolling up and down and up again until it was painfully clear, there was only one name I could call, one person who maybe cared enough about me as a person to actually help, one person who I knew had the sort of connections to at least point me in the right direction. I selected the name and quickly punched the “Call” button on the screen. The phone started ringing.
My mind began to race again, the anxiety creeping back in like the shadow of death in an elderly home.
What time was it?
Did they change their number?
Would they even answer?
But then, “Cable?” Her voice came through the ear piece and I felt all my worry melt away momentarily as my hand began to shake, the phone slightly vibrating against my head.
“Ab-Abby?” I stammered, struggling to remain calm.
“Cable, what’s wrong, you sound scared?” The concern in her voice was real and it made me smile despite my circumstances. It’d been a long time since I heard her sweet voice.
“Please, listen, I don’t have time and I don’t know what the media is saying-“ I paused, what were they saying? Had word gotten out yet? “What are you talking about?” She asked, interrupting my momentary loss to anxiety.
“I’ve been arrested.” I blurted it out, “And I need your help.”
I feel like I need to explain something to all of you.
Laura Howlett got my foot back in the door of Imperial Wrestling. After my last run I was black balled, banned, I was told in no uncertain terms that I didn’t have what it took to compete with the best the world had to offer and released.
It took me years to buildup my name and credibility to the point people weren’t just willing to take a risk on me, they were dying to have me appear at their shows and hold their championships.
Valentine comes to mind.
But Imperial Wrestling still wasn’t interested, for whatever reason Roberto Verona didn’t care about a name he didn’t create. I wasn’t one of his golden children like Dre Cutler or Killian Creed, I wasn’t a guy who cut my teeth in Imperial Wrestling so I wasn’t worth investing in, like wise, I wasn’t one of the top guys in NCW so I definitely wasn’t worth considering.
I found myself between a rock and a hard place when Laura Howlett came along and offered her assistance.
I was out of a job, the promotion I was dominating had gone belly up, I could have returned to the independent scene but Laura Howlett offered me a way back into Imperial Wrestling and let’s be honest with each other, who in my position wouldn’t want to be a part of IWF?
Her offer was simple, she would negotiate a temporary contract for me and I would do everything else. No one expected me to win the Heir to the Throne, let alone the circumstances that lead me to becoming the Imperial Champion but it happened. And it happened without Laura Howlett or her dreaded House ever sticking their noses into my matches.
I climbed the mountain, I silenced my critics in management, I returned to a company I couldn’t buy a win in and dominated.
All thanks to Laura Howlett.
While she threw her weight around like a fat man at a buffet I simply kept to myself. I didn’t participate in the attack on Nighthawk or anyone else who crossed her path. I sat back and only concerned myself with me, Cable Arcane, the Best in the World. You could argue my un-involvement makes me as guilty as they are but I would remind you there are plenty of people on the roster who weren’t concerned with the vicious things the House was doing.
People like Andrew Jacobsen like to point to the Extinction Event and Dre Cutler in particular as prime examples of the House of Howlett directly involving themselves in my rise to greatness but I would quickly counter you with, I never asked for or wanted their help and everytime Laura and her groupies stuck their noses in my business I made it a point to publicly reprimand her.
I never wanted to be a paper champion.
That’s why I refused to even touch the Imperial Championship after I won it back from Noah Field. I may be a cold hearted person but I am not a man without honor. I didn’t get into this business to simply win, I want to be remembered as the best.
And that is something I would like to remind my partner of this week. Jacobsen, look back on the Heir to the Throne, look back on my series of matches with Nighthawk, look back on my other matches besides the Extinction Event, look at the one and only time you and I ever faced, I never relied on or needed the help of the House of Howlett. I owe my rise to the top of Imperial Wrestling to nothing other than my own drive and determination.
Laura simply opened the door, I burned down the House.
And maybe that is exactly what is wrong with both of our opponents this week on Sacrifice.
Perennial side kicks.
Two men who have made their careers on answering to others.
Never becoming fully formed people.
Always card board cut outs in a group scene.
Bob Pooler and Jayson Matthews.
The extras.
I know the both of you have recent successes to point to as example of how great you can be but I am quickly forced to ask you what happened when each of stepped into the ring with truly remarkable individuals?
Bob Pooler fell to Steve Awesome and Jayson Matthews crumbled to Warren Kane.
You are two men who supposedly have all the talent in the world but I am left questioning your drive, your determination, your desire to rise to the top of the professional wrestling world. You may have the heart, you may have the dreams but do you have the raw talent to truly rise to the top and reign supreme if even for only a moment?
From what I’ve seen? No.
And I’m sorry if that’s to brutally honest for the two of you but I’ve never been one to mince words. I tell it like I see it and when I look at the two of you I see two guys who are just happy to have the chance to perform in front of the masses. Both of you have had more than one opportunity to truly shine, Matthews especially, who I not only squashed like an ant before I became Imperial Champion but I absolutely embarrassed when he used the Joker in the Pack to get into the match for the vacant Imperial Championship.
Each of you have been gifted multiple opportunities to rise to the top of not just Imperial Wrestling but other promotions as well and in the end you always revert to form and fail miserably.
I respect you for living your dream.
That’s it.
Everything else the two of you represent absolutely sickens me, from the pandering to the fans to the desire for love and respect among your peers.
My dad taught me a lesson as a child, a valuable lesson I carry with me to this day.
The people you work with aren’t your friends.
Their coworkers.
And in this line of business our coworkers are opponents and rivals. I can’t afford to worry about if the two of you like me, respect me or worship me. All I can worry about is whether or not I have the skill and ability to beat you to the point of unconsciousness to pin you for a full three seconds.
And honestly, that isn’t even really a question in my mind at this point.
I am the Best in the World.
You’re just a pair of Robin’s always looking to your Batman for direction.
And just to earn some comic book cred, you’re not a team of Dick Grayson’s, Tim Drake’s or even Damien Wayne’s.
You’re a pair of Jason Todd’s and the fans just voted to see you beat to death with a crowbar.
The crowbar being me, Cable Arcane.
The Best in the World.
No sleep. No rest. No mercy.
Laura Howlett got my foot back in the door of Imperial Wrestling. After my last run I was black balled, banned, I was told in no uncertain terms that I didn’t have what it took to compete with the best the world had to offer and released.
It took me years to buildup my name and credibility to the point people weren’t just willing to take a risk on me, they were dying to have me appear at their shows and hold their championships.
Valentine comes to mind.
But Imperial Wrestling still wasn’t interested, for whatever reason Roberto Verona didn’t care about a name he didn’t create. I wasn’t one of his golden children like Dre Cutler or Killian Creed, I wasn’t a guy who cut my teeth in Imperial Wrestling so I wasn’t worth investing in, like wise, I wasn’t one of the top guys in NCW so I definitely wasn’t worth considering.
I found myself between a rock and a hard place when Laura Howlett came along and offered her assistance.
I was out of a job, the promotion I was dominating had gone belly up, I could have returned to the independent scene but Laura Howlett offered me a way back into Imperial Wrestling and let’s be honest with each other, who in my position wouldn’t want to be a part of IWF?
Her offer was simple, she would negotiate a temporary contract for me and I would do everything else. No one expected me to win the Heir to the Throne, let alone the circumstances that lead me to becoming the Imperial Champion but it happened. And it happened without Laura Howlett or her dreaded House ever sticking their noses into my matches.
I climbed the mountain, I silenced my critics in management, I returned to a company I couldn’t buy a win in and dominated.
All thanks to Laura Howlett.
While she threw her weight around like a fat man at a buffet I simply kept to myself. I didn’t participate in the attack on Nighthawk or anyone else who crossed her path. I sat back and only concerned myself with me, Cable Arcane, the Best in the World. You could argue my un-involvement makes me as guilty as they are but I would remind you there are plenty of people on the roster who weren’t concerned with the vicious things the House was doing.
People like Andrew Jacobsen like to point to the Extinction Event and Dre Cutler in particular as prime examples of the House of Howlett directly involving themselves in my rise to greatness but I would quickly counter you with, I never asked for or wanted their help and everytime Laura and her groupies stuck their noses in my business I made it a point to publicly reprimand her.
I never wanted to be a paper champion.
That’s why I refused to even touch the Imperial Championship after I won it back from Noah Field. I may be a cold hearted person but I am not a man without honor. I didn’t get into this business to simply win, I want to be remembered as the best.
And that is something I would like to remind my partner of this week. Jacobsen, look back on the Heir to the Throne, look back on my series of matches with Nighthawk, look back on my other matches besides the Extinction Event, look at the one and only time you and I ever faced, I never relied on or needed the help of the House of Howlett. I owe my rise to the top of Imperial Wrestling to nothing other than my own drive and determination.
Laura simply opened the door, I burned down the House.
And maybe that is exactly what is wrong with both of our opponents this week on Sacrifice.
Perennial side kicks.
Two men who have made their careers on answering to others.
Never becoming fully formed people.
Always card board cut outs in a group scene.
Bob Pooler and Jayson Matthews.
The extras.
I know the both of you have recent successes to point to as example of how great you can be but I am quickly forced to ask you what happened when each of stepped into the ring with truly remarkable individuals?
Bob Pooler fell to Steve Awesome and Jayson Matthews crumbled to Warren Kane.
You are two men who supposedly have all the talent in the world but I am left questioning your drive, your determination, your desire to rise to the top of the professional wrestling world. You may have the heart, you may have the dreams but do you have the raw talent to truly rise to the top and reign supreme if even for only a moment?
From what I’ve seen? No.
And I’m sorry if that’s to brutally honest for the two of you but I’ve never been one to mince words. I tell it like I see it and when I look at the two of you I see two guys who are just happy to have the chance to perform in front of the masses. Both of you have had more than one opportunity to truly shine, Matthews especially, who I not only squashed like an ant before I became Imperial Champion but I absolutely embarrassed when he used the Joker in the Pack to get into the match for the vacant Imperial Championship.
Each of you have been gifted multiple opportunities to rise to the top of not just Imperial Wrestling but other promotions as well and in the end you always revert to form and fail miserably.
I respect you for living your dream.
That’s it.
Everything else the two of you represent absolutely sickens me, from the pandering to the fans to the desire for love and respect among your peers.
My dad taught me a lesson as a child, a valuable lesson I carry with me to this day.
The people you work with aren’t your friends.
Their coworkers.
And in this line of business our coworkers are opponents and rivals. I can’t afford to worry about if the two of you like me, respect me or worship me. All I can worry about is whether or not I have the skill and ability to beat you to the point of unconsciousness to pin you for a full three seconds.
And honestly, that isn’t even really a question in my mind at this point.
I am the Best in the World.
You’re just a pair of Robin’s always looking to your Batman for direction.
And just to earn some comic book cred, you’re not a team of Dick Grayson’s, Tim Drake’s or even Damien Wayne’s.
You’re a pair of Jason Todd’s and the fans just voted to see you beat to death with a crowbar.
The crowbar being me, Cable Arcane.
The Best in the World.
No sleep. No rest. No mercy.
Well howdy there pardner.