Post by Awesome Stick Labor on Jun 4, 2017 15:34:12 GMT
Chapter 4
"GILMORE FOR MAYOR - PART I"
June 2, 2017 - 8:30 PM
Inside the Keg Room...
...we find James Gilmore and his "refinement coach," Mr. Grawn, lounging about at the bar, finishing off some glass bottles of Budweiser as legendary country crooner Conway Twitty's 1958 standard, "It's Only Make Believe," played from a small jukebox in the corner. It had been raining off and on throughout the day, which was typical weather for Corpus Christi going into the month of June. Agnes Hobson, a woman aged 67 affectionately dubbed "Miss Aggie," strolled into the picture, collecting the two empty beer bottles and tossing them into a green glass-recycling bin.
MISS AGGIE: Would y'all like another beer?
JAMES GILMORE: No thank you, ma'am.
Mr. Grawn shook his head before outstretching his arms. Yet he noticed that Gilmore's eyes were closed--as if he was thinking of something.
MR. GRAWN: You alright bub? Ya look a l'il bit...edgy.
James nodded, peering his eyes upon a small HDTV screen that was showing Fox News.
JAMES: Sometimes I find myself wonderin' what the heck's goin' on. Sanctuary this, sanctuary that......it's, like, a total bummer that we have to sit there and give these illegal folks our money just to keep 'em in the livin', protectin' them if they do somethin' stupid for fear of splittin' families up...
MR. GRAWN: They don't wanna hand 'em over 'cuz they think they're gonna hurt their feelin's...we've become a country where we put our feelin's over common sense.
JAMES: Yeahhh...that ain't rad, man...very un-'Murrican.
Both men nodded their heads in agreement with each other. Ricky Grawn, the proud ex-Marine, couldn't help but muster a sly grin on his mug--for an idea had come across his mind.
MR. GRAWN: Ya know somethin' Gimore...you oughta surprise the snot outta Corpus Christi! You can run for mayor!
The Islander alum's own smirk began to show as he gasped, thinking about all the possibilities...
JAMES: Mayor...?!
...at that moment, it all dawned on him.
Corpus Christi had been without a Mayor since January 19th--nearly six months--after its previous holder, Dan McQueen, resigned the posting in a now-infamous tweet that went viral. The very thought of someone like Gilmore, a relative outsider with zero political background--sounded appealing to him and Mr. Grawn.
"After all," James thought to himself as his smile grew wider, "if Mr. Trump can be President, why can't *I*" be Mayor?!"
JAMES: Now THAT'S a helluva good idea, Mr. Grawn! I can run for mayor!
Two old-time veteran customers of the Keg Room, sporting distinctive black Stetson cowboy hats and snakeskin boots with silver spurs, around 80 years of age, laughed riotously as Gilmore and Mr. Grawn perked up both brows.
OLD-TIMER #1: Now gawl-dernit...I didn't know wrasslin' was back in town!
The second elderly gentlemen, smoking a cigar, pointing at James' "Make America Great Again" shirt.
OLD-TIMER #2: Ya look like ye got that shirt off of a dad-gum dead convict.
From the back storage room, we hear Aggie cackling with glee as the old men continued chuckling.
MISS AGGIE: *raspberries* A pro wrassler for mayor, like that other guy who was Minnesota governor?! Believe me...it'll be the end of the world as we know it.
James, hearing the snickers and the guffaws from the longtimers in the pub, eked out a sly, defiant smirk.
JAMES: Just ya wait an' see, Miss Aggie...I *WILL* be mayor! I'm gonna be the most powerful Islander alum-dude in the whole joint, and I'm gonna make Corpus Christi great again!
The two old-time cowboys continue chuckling as Aggie strolled out from the back, handing Gilmore his bill.
MISS AGGIE: Good for you, sweetheart--you can start by payin' this here $10.47 tab you owe me for the beer you ordered! 'Cuz quite frankly, my dear...you've had a l'il bit too much to drink tonight.
James laughed as he pulled out his debit card. He knew Miss Aggie for many years, that her tough talk was a mere smokescreen to conceal their friendship. Even Grawn couldn't help but chuckle, watching as his trainee handed the wise, old lady his card, but the moment of joy would be short-lived when, out of nowhere...
~BANG-BANG! BANG-BANG!! BANG!!!~
...gunshots erupted from the watering hole's entrance--the universal signal for everyone to get down on the floor. Bullets ricocheted from all angles as James and Company took cover. They didn't see the lone gunman--the leader of the Los Locos Athletic Club himself, sporting his distinctive "El Diablo" shirt--but they heard his all-too-familiar Latino accent and inflection as the shooting stopped.
"LOS LOCOS FOREVER, PUTAS!! WHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"
The bad guy had managed to run off before anyone can give chase. The bar was quiet, but everyone inside was alright. Yet deep down within the soul of one James Gilmore, he couldn't help but feel the fire burn within as he--and the occupants--lied face-first on the tile...
...he was *going* to run for Mayor.
He was going to make his adopted hometown safe again--no matter the price.
~TO BE CONTINUED~
"GILMORE FOR MAYOR - PART I"
June 2, 2017 - 8:30 PM
Inside the Keg Room...
...we find James Gilmore and his "refinement coach," Mr. Grawn, lounging about at the bar, finishing off some glass bottles of Budweiser as legendary country crooner Conway Twitty's 1958 standard, "It's Only Make Believe," played from a small jukebox in the corner. It had been raining off and on throughout the day, which was typical weather for Corpus Christi going into the month of June. Agnes Hobson, a woman aged 67 affectionately dubbed "Miss Aggie," strolled into the picture, collecting the two empty beer bottles and tossing them into a green glass-recycling bin.
MISS AGGIE: Would y'all like another beer?
JAMES GILMORE: No thank you, ma'am.
Mr. Grawn shook his head before outstretching his arms. Yet he noticed that Gilmore's eyes were closed--as if he was thinking of something.
MR. GRAWN: You alright bub? Ya look a l'il bit...edgy.
James nodded, peering his eyes upon a small HDTV screen that was showing Fox News.
JAMES: Sometimes I find myself wonderin' what the heck's goin' on. Sanctuary this, sanctuary that......it's, like, a total bummer that we have to sit there and give these illegal folks our money just to keep 'em in the livin', protectin' them if they do somethin' stupid for fear of splittin' families up...
MR. GRAWN: They don't wanna hand 'em over 'cuz they think they're gonna hurt their feelin's...we've become a country where we put our feelin's over common sense.
JAMES: Yeahhh...that ain't rad, man...very un-'Murrican.
Both men nodded their heads in agreement with each other. Ricky Grawn, the proud ex-Marine, couldn't help but muster a sly grin on his mug--for an idea had come across his mind.
MR. GRAWN: Ya know somethin' Gimore...you oughta surprise the snot outta Corpus Christi! You can run for mayor!
The Islander alum's own smirk began to show as he gasped, thinking about all the possibilities...
JAMES: Mayor...?!
...at that moment, it all dawned on him.
Corpus Christi had been without a Mayor since January 19th--nearly six months--after its previous holder, Dan McQueen, resigned the posting in a now-infamous tweet that went viral. The very thought of someone like Gilmore, a relative outsider with zero political background--sounded appealing to him and Mr. Grawn.
"After all," James thought to himself as his smile grew wider, "if Mr. Trump can be President, why can't *I*" be Mayor?!"
JAMES: Now THAT'S a helluva good idea, Mr. Grawn! I can run for mayor!
Two old-time veteran customers of the Keg Room, sporting distinctive black Stetson cowboy hats and snakeskin boots with silver spurs, around 80 years of age, laughed riotously as Gilmore and Mr. Grawn perked up both brows.
OLD-TIMER #1: Now gawl-dernit...I didn't know wrasslin' was back in town!
The second elderly gentlemen, smoking a cigar, pointing at James' "Make America Great Again" shirt.
OLD-TIMER #2: Ya look like ye got that shirt off of a dad-gum dead convict.
From the back storage room, we hear Aggie cackling with glee as the old men continued chuckling.
MISS AGGIE: *raspberries* A pro wrassler for mayor, like that other guy who was Minnesota governor?! Believe me...it'll be the end of the world as we know it.
James, hearing the snickers and the guffaws from the longtimers in the pub, eked out a sly, defiant smirk.
JAMES: Just ya wait an' see, Miss Aggie...I *WILL* be mayor! I'm gonna be the most powerful Islander alum-dude in the whole joint, and I'm gonna make Corpus Christi great again!
The two old-time cowboys continue chuckling as Aggie strolled out from the back, handing Gilmore his bill.
MISS AGGIE: Good for you, sweetheart--you can start by payin' this here $10.47 tab you owe me for the beer you ordered! 'Cuz quite frankly, my dear...you've had a l'il bit too much to drink tonight.
James laughed as he pulled out his debit card. He knew Miss Aggie for many years, that her tough talk was a mere smokescreen to conceal their friendship. Even Grawn couldn't help but chuckle, watching as his trainee handed the wise, old lady his card, but the moment of joy would be short-lived when, out of nowhere...
~BANG-BANG! BANG-BANG!! BANG!!!~
...gunshots erupted from the watering hole's entrance--the universal signal for everyone to get down on the floor. Bullets ricocheted from all angles as James and Company took cover. They didn't see the lone gunman--the leader of the Los Locos Athletic Club himself, sporting his distinctive "El Diablo" shirt--but they heard his all-too-familiar Latino accent and inflection as the shooting stopped.
"LOS LOCOS FOREVER, PUTAS!! WHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!"
The bad guy had managed to run off before anyone can give chase. The bar was quiet, but everyone inside was alright. Yet deep down within the soul of one James Gilmore, he couldn't help but feel the fire burn within as he--and the occupants--lied face-first on the tile...
...he was *going* to run for Mayor.
He was going to make his adopted hometown safe again--no matter the price.
~TO BE CONTINUED~
FROM THE OFFICE OF JAMES GILMORE
Date: June 2, 2017
My fellow dudes and dudettes...
For too long--for FAR too long--the establishment that is the Imperial Wrestling Federation has tried desperately to force good-natured folks like myself to accept THEIR beliefs and ideologies as the one and only truth, the law of the land to put it mildly. To do this, they rely on the ONE THING that has always kept them in power since day one...
...their sense of "pride."
On the Twtter feed, I've seen the word "pride" bein' used as a way to describe tolerance for LGBTQ community, and while the term, in this day and age, refers to that specific part of our society, what many for forgettin'...is that "pride" can be used for a number of different things. Like, say...people are proud of who they are 'cuz of the color of their skin, 'cuz of their moral codes, 'cuz of where they come from, 'cuz of their achievements in the private business sector...I could go on and on, but the point about it all is REAL simple. The establishment wants you to believe that we should be prideful of ourselves and others, but here's the deal.
You can expand on the meanin' of the word or how people use it all ya want to, but the result remains the same...
....it's a double-edged sword--one of the seven deadly sins.
On the bright side...pride is praise towards a group of people for doin' somethin' special, a product of praise, personal self-reflection, and an overall feelin' that ya belong in society. Yet on the negative end...pride stems from an irrational and corrupt sense of one's personal value--whether it'd be through social status, sexual orientation, or yeah...even your accomplishments in the real world. And I ask each and every one of you...what happens when the elitists of IWF--with their self-righteous values and all that other hot mess--have to deal with the fact that soneone hurt their sense of well-bein', when the cards don't turn up the way they want them to?!
And I answer...
....they play the role of victim, cryin' for YOUR sympathy like it's a government entitlement, lashin' out with threats of violence when, say, the same-sex dudes and dudettes are insulted yet do NOTHIN' when they insult the law-abidin', hard-workin', tax-payin' people...like you...
...and ME. Liberal logic all-around!
One of those so-called "elites"...happens to be my opposite this week.
When Crooked Dre Cutler uses uses his stature as an African-American, he will try to gain sympathy from the people around him. He will try ANYTHING at his disposal to to pass himself off as an entitled victim of a perceived "white man" society. Yet when he came up short in last year's Heir to the Throne, what did he do when the chips didn't keep goin' in his general direction?! What did he accomplish when the House of Howlett bit the dust, huh?!? He took his ball...and ran back home to Montgomery, Alabama.
And now...he wants to win this year's Heir to the Throne series by goin' on some road to redemption--which has been nothin' more than an overly-used trope to prop people up 'cuz they THINK they belong!?! He wants YOU--The People--to believe that his goals were "not met," that he wants to somehow finish what he started!
But I see through that like the proverbial $150 rangefinder! In fact, it's bogus...big league--like, totally--bogus!
The REAL victims in this country--and around the world--don't ask for sympathy from others. They persevere through the gnarly fires of hell and brimstone which has consumed our planet, truckin' along in spite of an ever-changing society around them that takes GREAT pleasure in relyin' on feelings instead of common sense. They never, EVER quit--even as the goin's get tougher and tougher every single day. Yet they--in spite of their physical or mental faults, race, or sexuality--are the forgotten men, women, and children...bein' overshadowed by those elitists who would use YOUR own misfortunes as an crutch for their own personal glory and whim.
Much like Crooked Dre. He ain't no victim.
When his so-called "road to redemption" comes to a screechin' halt, he'll lose his African-American temperament and run back home, quittin' on each and every one of the very same people that are SUPPOSED to "cheer" for him! Why?! It's real simple...he lets his pride for bein' a "superior" and "mentally tough" athlete get the best of him.
Nothin' more...nothin' less. It don't take no rocket science to expose him for what he truly is.
He's nothin' but covfefe--FAKE NEWS!!! And believe me...if there's one thing I despise more in our left-wing worshippin' jungle that is America and IWF...it's fake news.
But ya see...Crooked Cutler is just the start of somethin' VERY, VERY big. I'm gonna be enterin' the Heir to the Throne series too, and the first thing I'm gonna do...is build a totally...RADICAL Wall! And Mr. Cutler...one way or the other...will PAY for that Wall.
Believe me, it's gonna happen--there ain't no choice. The forgotten people...will never be forgotten again...
...for *I* will be your Champion. I will be *your* voice--willin' to serve, ready to shine. Together, we will make IWF fun again! We will make IWF awesome again! We will make IWF strong again...
...and, heck yeah, even if someone out there wants to silence me, it won't matter one bit--'cuz we will Make Imperial Great Again!!
#MIGA
Date: June 2, 2017
My fellow dudes and dudettes...
For too long--for FAR too long--the establishment that is the Imperial Wrestling Federation has tried desperately to force good-natured folks like myself to accept THEIR beliefs and ideologies as the one and only truth, the law of the land to put it mildly. To do this, they rely on the ONE THING that has always kept them in power since day one...
...their sense of "pride."
On the Twtter feed, I've seen the word "pride" bein' used as a way to describe tolerance for LGBTQ community, and while the term, in this day and age, refers to that specific part of our society, what many for forgettin'...is that "pride" can be used for a number of different things. Like, say...people are proud of who they are 'cuz of the color of their skin, 'cuz of their moral codes, 'cuz of where they come from, 'cuz of their achievements in the private business sector...I could go on and on, but the point about it all is REAL simple. The establishment wants you to believe that we should be prideful of ourselves and others, but here's the deal.
You can expand on the meanin' of the word or how people use it all ya want to, but the result remains the same...
....it's a double-edged sword--one of the seven deadly sins.
On the bright side...pride is praise towards a group of people for doin' somethin' special, a product of praise, personal self-reflection, and an overall feelin' that ya belong in society. Yet on the negative end...pride stems from an irrational and corrupt sense of one's personal value--whether it'd be through social status, sexual orientation, or yeah...even your accomplishments in the real world. And I ask each and every one of you...what happens when the elitists of IWF--with their self-righteous values and all that other hot mess--have to deal with the fact that soneone hurt their sense of well-bein', when the cards don't turn up the way they want them to?!
And I answer...
....they play the role of victim, cryin' for YOUR sympathy like it's a government entitlement, lashin' out with threats of violence when, say, the same-sex dudes and dudettes are insulted yet do NOTHIN' when they insult the law-abidin', hard-workin', tax-payin' people...like you...
...and ME. Liberal logic all-around!
One of those so-called "elites"...happens to be my opposite this week.
When Crooked Dre Cutler uses uses his stature as an African-American, he will try to gain sympathy from the people around him. He will try ANYTHING at his disposal to to pass himself off as an entitled victim of a perceived "white man" society. Yet when he came up short in last year's Heir to the Throne, what did he do when the chips didn't keep goin' in his general direction?! What did he accomplish when the House of Howlett bit the dust, huh?!? He took his ball...and ran back home to Montgomery, Alabama.
And now...he wants to win this year's Heir to the Throne series by goin' on some road to redemption--which has been nothin' more than an overly-used trope to prop people up 'cuz they THINK they belong!?! He wants YOU--The People--to believe that his goals were "not met," that he wants to somehow finish what he started!
But I see through that like the proverbial $150 rangefinder! In fact, it's bogus...big league--like, totally--bogus!
The REAL victims in this country--and around the world--don't ask for sympathy from others. They persevere through the gnarly fires of hell and brimstone which has consumed our planet, truckin' along in spite of an ever-changing society around them that takes GREAT pleasure in relyin' on feelings instead of common sense. They never, EVER quit--even as the goin's get tougher and tougher every single day. Yet they--in spite of their physical or mental faults, race, or sexuality--are the forgotten men, women, and children...bein' overshadowed by those elitists who would use YOUR own misfortunes as an crutch for their own personal glory and whim.
Much like Crooked Dre. He ain't no victim.
When his so-called "road to redemption" comes to a screechin' halt, he'll lose his African-American temperament and run back home, quittin' on each and every one of the very same people that are SUPPOSED to "cheer" for him! Why?! It's real simple...he lets his pride for bein' a "superior" and "mentally tough" athlete get the best of him.
Nothin' more...nothin' less. It don't take no rocket science to expose him for what he truly is.
He's nothin' but covfefe--FAKE NEWS!!! And believe me...if there's one thing I despise more in our left-wing worshippin' jungle that is America and IWF...it's fake news.
But ya see...Crooked Cutler is just the start of somethin' VERY, VERY big. I'm gonna be enterin' the Heir to the Throne series too, and the first thing I'm gonna do...is build a totally...RADICAL Wall! And Mr. Cutler...one way or the other...will PAY for that Wall.
Believe me, it's gonna happen--there ain't no choice. The forgotten people...will never be forgotten again...
...for *I* will be your Champion. I will be *your* voice--willin' to serve, ready to shine. Together, we will make IWF fun again! We will make IWF awesome again! We will make IWF strong again...
...and, heck yeah, even if someone out there wants to silence me, it won't matter one bit--'cuz we will Make Imperial Great Again!!
#MIGA